


What Should Have Been

by IsabellElle (sabeea)



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Healer Lily, Healer Remus, Honeydukes Peter, M/M, Minor James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, POV Sirius Black, Quidditch player James, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin - Freeform, Voldy-Free AU, if voldemort hadn't been around, peter is pretty cool, sort of time travel, starts at graduation, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-08
Updated: 2016-09-15
Packaged: 2018-07-13 22:12:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 20,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7139624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sabeea/pseuds/IsabellElle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sirius and Remus died, but they were given another chance. Sent back to the morning of their Hogwarts graduation, they start from the beginning in a world where Voldemort never rose to power. This is the story of what should have been.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Graduation Day

**Author's Note:**

> I (so, so obviously) do not own Harry Potter or any of the characters in the universe. This is a work in progress, and tags will be added as we go along. Thanks for reading!

Sirius felt himself falling through the veil. And he kept falling, well past the point where he should have landed on the stone floor on the other side.

He chalked this up to the spell that had killed him. _Oh Harry,_ he thought, _I’m so sorry._

 

After what seemed an eternity but may have only been a second, Sirius realized he was no longer falling. Instead, he was cocooned in something incredibly soft and warm. He opened his eyes. There were Gryffindor hangings above his head.

 

As he reluctantly untangled himself from his blankets, Sirius took stock of his surroundings. He was in a smaller version of a Gryffindor dormitory. He looked down to find himself dressed in his favorite pajamas. _Odd_ , he thought. _I thought dying would be more final_.

 

He made for what he assumed was the bathroom door, and noticed as he did so that his old school trunk was at the foot of his bed. With a shrug, he opened it to find a familiar mess – but more importantly, his favorite pair of jeans and an old t-shirt that he was fairly certain had been destroyed by a curse years ago. Carrying the clothes to the bathroom, Sirius tugged off his pajama shirt. It was only once it was over his head that he saw his reflection in the mirror and yelped.

 

He dropped everything. Staring back at him from the mirror was a teenager; one who had obviously never experienced Azkaban. A bit wild-eyed, he turned. Yes, he was definitely in the body of his teenage self. Eighteen, if he had to guess. Which brought up the question of _how in the bloody hell had he gone back in time_.

Still shirtless, he burst back into the dormitory, and shrieked. There on his bed sat James Potter.

“Prongs,” he breathed. “What in the name of Merlin?”

James smiled. “Padfoot, mate! Good to see you. Sorry you ended up here, of course.”

Sirius stared. “…here?”

The smile fell from James’ face. “Ah, yes. About that. You see, you’re dead.” He looked up at Sirius nervously, as though he expected shock or outrage.

Instead, Sirius just shrugged. “Yeah, I figured. My dear cousin hit me with a Killing Curse – there aren’t many ways that it could have turned out. Does this have something to do with the veil?”

“What veil?” James asked, but then waved his hand and continued before Sirius could answer. “No, mate, this is what you might call an afterlife. It’s what should have been.”

 

After a moment’s silence, during which he looked at Sirius expectantly, James exhaled. “What?”

“What the hell do you mean, afterlife?” Sirius said.

James wrinkled his nose. “I’m not explaining this right. You got short-changed, mate, getting me as your guide.”

“ _Guide?”_

“Yeah, yeah, I got my dad, he was great. Could explain it all. Too bad Lily can’t explain this to you, it’d be a lot easier.” James waved his hand again when Sirius started to ask another question. “Anyway, it’s not permanent here. It’s like a second chance. You know, because some shite happened to you during your life. This is what should have happened instead.”

Sirius rubbed his temples. “Lily?”

James grinned. “Yeah, we got here at the same time. Harry showed up a few hours later, and we got to raise him. She would have said hi, you know, but she’s moved on. Won’t come back unless she has to be someone’s guide. Mate, what the hell?”

Sirius had grabbed James by the collar. “Harry? What do you mean, Harry’s here? He’s dead?”

“Mate, calm down. No, he died when he was 115, peacefully and surrounded by his family. But time’s funny here – it doesn’t really exist in the same reality as the living world. Lily has some brilliant theories about it, but I don’t understand a word.”

Sirius sat back, relieved. “I’m still confused.”

“Right,” James said, becoming more business-like. “So you’ve been sent back to Hogwarts. I’m guessing that you’ll be graduating today.”

“How do you figure?” Sirius asked, then felt foolish as James pointed out a graduation robe and cap that was draped over the desk.

James continued. “So now you’ll get to live your life starting from graduation.”

“What if I screw it up again?”

The other boy gave him an understanding smile. “You’ll be fine, Padfoot.”

“Will you be here?” Sirius asked.

James shook his head, hesitated, and then nodded. “Yes. No. Maybe.”

“Right, then,” Sirius said. “That clears that right up.”

There was a huff. “There will be a version of me, but not this version. I’ll be eighteen, just like you, except without the other life.” James looked him square in the eye. “I can’t be your guide after this.”

Sirius rolled his eyes. “Fine. So how do I go about not ending up in Azkaban this time?” James raised an eyebrow. “Yeah, Azkaban. Thirteen bloody years.”

There was a low whistle from the other boy. “Well, follow your heart.”

“ _Follow my heart?_ What in Merlin’s name is that supposed to mean?” Sirius asked.

James shrugged. “Dunno. But all the people who shouldn’t be here aren’t,” he finished decisively. At Sirius’ blank look, he tried again. “I mean, the people who screwed up our lives because they were twisted or evil – they don’t get to try again. At least, not here. Maybe in some other reality. But there’s no Voldemort here, because by the time he became Voldemort, he was pure evil. There are people who are complete arses, like Snivellus and such, and they can be annoying at times, but there’s no senseless death, no _actual_ evil.”

There was a pause as Sirius tried to process this. “So…Wormtail?”

James shrugged. “No Voldemort, so he didn’t betray us. There was no need for him to be our Secret-Keeper, anyway.” At Sirius’ dubious expression, he continued. “I’m not saying this is a utopia. There’s bad stuff, but there’s also this sense of, I dunno – fairness, maybe. Where things even out a bit. Not right away, but eventually. You’ll see what I mean.”

With this, he rose from the bed. “Sirius, mate, it’s good to see you. I wish you every happiness, and you’ll see me soon. Don’t let me get into too much trouble.”

Sirius snorted, then a thought struck him. “Prongs, you had Lily. How am I going to do this by myself?”

James smiled. “I have a feeling someone else will join you shortly. Just go with the flow.” He pulled Sirius into a hug, which Sirius was too surprised to properly return, released him, and disappeared through the door with a jaunty wave.

 

After staring gob-smacked at the door for a minute, Sirius pulled himself together. If this wasn’t some bizarre hallucination, and he had some strange sense that it wasn’t, he was going to graduate in a few hours. Either way, he’d benefit from a nice hot shower and some real clothes.

 

Fifteen minutes later, Sirius emerged from the bathroom feeling refreshed, and let out another shriek. The dormitory had changed a bit – this time, there were two beds, and Remus Lupin was sitting on one, looking thoroughly confused.

 

“What just happened?” Remus asked.

“We’re dead,” Sirius said.

“Lily?” Remus ignored Sirius and hugged an invisible person.

“You got Lily? How is that even fair? I got Prongs!” Remus continued ignoring him, so Sirius shrugged and got dressed. By that time, Remus had apparently been briefed by Lily as to the situation at hand, and hugged her one more time. “Bye, Lily,” Sirius called. “How’s it going, Moony?”

 

Remus turned to look at Sirius. “You saw her too?” he asked.

Sirius shook his head and shrugged. “Just an educated guess. She was your guide to the afterlife, eh?”

Remus raised his eyebrows. “Wait, so you’re dead too? Or are you another guide?”

“I just got here half an hour ago, mate,” Sirius replied. “I guess we go through the afterlife in pairs? Anyway, did you die at the Ministry too? Did you fall through the veil?”

“No…” Remus looked confused again. “Oh, I see. Time is different here, eh? Well, I survived another three years. There was this battle at Hogwarts, and I thought Harry was dead, but Lily says he makes it to 115, so I guess I was misinformed. Anyway, your dear cousin got me with a Killing Curse.”

“High five!” exclaimed Sirius. “Me too!” Remus gave him a Look. He cleared his throat. “I’m sorry. Too soon? But I’m glad you’re here, Moony. I was so nervous about graduating again and no one else knowing what was going on.”

Remus gave him a trademark Moony smile – tired, but warm and sincere. “We’ll get through this,” he reassured Sirius. “Let’s go graduate.”

 

There were other matters to take care of first, of course. Remus was still in pajamas, and went to take a shower. Sirius went to the window to see what was going on outside – there was a marquee set up, and parents were milling around the foot of the Gryffindor tower. He watched for a bit, then heard the shower stop and the bathroom door open. Turning around, he saw Remus staring wide-eyed at the room, which had changed once again.

“Finally! You took forever in there, Moony!” exclaimed James, and pushed past him into the bathroom, followed by a tousled Peter in pajamas.

“You’re already dressed and ready!” the smaller boy complained, hammering on the rapidly closing bathroom door. “I get the next turn!”

 

“Whatever!” James called through the door, and Peter slumped against it, waiting. Remus raised his eyebrows at Sirius, who shrugged. This was pretty much as he remembered. He remembered – but the memories of what was to happen were becoming fuzzier, older. There were new memories making themselves in his head instead. Regulus being not a total arsehole, for example… A hand rested on his shoulder, and he shook himself out of the reverie. “Mate? You all right?” Remus asked, looking concerned.

“Yeah… yeah,” Sirius said. “Are you getting memories of things that didn’t happen?”

Remus nodded. “Lily said that’s normal. That we’d start remembering things from this reality, so we won’t look like we’re crazy to everyone around us. But we’ll still have the other memories too.”

“Good,” Sirius said fervently. “I mean, it’s not like I want to remember Azkaban every day, but there were good things too.”

“I know,” Remus said. “But look, it’s nearly time to graduate. Let’s get ready.”

 

Once James had finally allowed Peter into the washroom, and the four of them had donned caps and robes, they headed down to the great lawn. The Potters, Lupins, Evanses, and Pettigrews immediately surrounded them, and Sirius was only half surprised to see Regulus among the crowd. He pulled his younger brother into a half-hug, and it was returned with interest. There was chatter, only a fraction of which Sirius understood, as it all seemed to happen at the same time, and then bagpipes started up. “Go, find your seats,” Mrs. Potter urged them, and they extricated themselves from the families and obeyed.

 

Graduation seemed to take no time at all, and Sirius would later recall only bits and pieces. As he walked across the platform, he smirked at the thought that he was the first of them all to graduate, and waved to the crowd where he knew his friends would be sitting. He heard a loud whoop from James when his name was announced, and returned the favor when James’ name was called. After the last student crossed the platform, Dumbledore gravely pronounced them all full wizards, and waved his wand; their caps turned into pointed hats. James let out another whoop and punched the air at exactly the same moment that Sirius did. Lily, sitting in the next row back from Sirius, rolled her eyes.

 

The post-graduation celebration was a blur of family, friends, and cake. The house-elves had set up tables outside, and Sirius and his friends basked in the sunlight and praise for their accomplishments. Remus and Lily had graduated with Outstandings, of course, and even Sirius, James, and Peter had received O’s in their Defense Against the Dark Arts N.E.W.T.s, thanks to Remus’ tutoring. They compared their diplomas, which shone in the sun, and the Potters poured champagne for each of them.

 

Eventually, the sun began to set over the mountains, and the crowds began to dissipate. The families congratulated the graduates one more time, and set off for the Disapparition Point set up in Hogsmeade. The Marauders and Lily looked at each other, and Lily burst into tears. “I can’t believe it’s over!” she wailed, and James took her in his arms.

Remus patted her shoulder. “It’s not really over,” he said reasonably. “We’re moving into a flat together, we’ll be closer than ever. But we should go pack. Don’t we have to be off campus by ten tomorrow morning?”

They trailed up to Gryffindor Tower, Lily still leaning on James, Sirius with his arms flung over the shoulders of Remus and Peter.

“This is the start of something amazing,” Sirius declared. “And we’re all in it together.”


	2. The Goblin Punching Bag

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Following graduation, the Marauders move into a London flat; their new jobs are revealed (Sirius' twice).

The next morning, Remus roused James and Peter (Sirius had barely slept and had been up since four) at six, and they spent a panicked two hours throwing things into trunks, on which Remus had to cast Undetectable Expansion spells. Breakfast was delivered to the common room, and they met Lily for a hurried meal before Remus ushered them downstairs, levitating their trunks in front of them. (Remus had refused to let Sirius “chuck them out the window, then put Cushioning Charms on the ground,” though Sirius thought it was a well-reasoned idea.)

 

The process of leaving was somewhat hampered by all of the last-minute goodbyes, and though they’d left plenty of time, it was five of ten by the time they joined the crowd at the Disapparition Point, and well past ten-thirty when they Disapparated, one by one, to their new flat.

 

The Houghton Building was magical, one could tell that as soon as one stepped out of London and into the lobby. Bright, airy, and larger than might have been expected, it housed a number of young wizards, now including Sirius and his friends. Arriving in the middle of their new flat, Sirius immediately turned into a dog, and romped around while the others Apparated into the living room with quiet pops.

“Sirius, I swear to Merlin, if you mark your territory in here…” James called, but he was laughing. Sirius lifted a leg and pretended to piss on one of the bedroom doors.

“I guess that’s yours, then,” Remus said, and Lily groaned.

“Remind me again why I decided to live with you boys?” she asked.

“Because we’re charming and lovable, of course,” James said, and kissed her.

“Ewwww,” Sirius and Peter said together. Lily rolled her eyes at them.

 

They divided up the bedrooms – Lily and James got the largest one, Remus claimed two (the smallest one for a library, and the one nearest the library for his own), Sirius discovered that the one he had claimed had a great view out on the Eye of London, and Peter’s was right next to the kitchen. After that, it was just a matter of levitating trunks into the proper rooms (“God, I love that we’re wizards,” said Lily) and unpacking. That took most of the day, though Remus and Lily found time to go shopping for kitchen appliances and supplies, and Sirius and James took turns nipping down to the department store on the corner for things they had forgotten or simply never needed (“Toilet paper! How did we forget toilet paper?” “Because the house-elves always got it for us!”). Peter, having focused entirely on his own room, was the first to finish unpacking, and was delegated to alphabetizing the books in the library (“How is there not a spell for this?” he asked Remus, and was rewarded with a gigantic spellbook titled _The Librarian’s Companion_ ).

 

By dark, the flat looked vaguely livable, and Sirius and Peter were able to cook dinner (thanks in part to a little book Peter had discovered called the _Everything Young Wizard’s Cookbook_ ) and serve it on their new plates on their new table. Lily and Remus had only been able to find sets of four chairs, so James spent the better part of the evening trying to conjure a chair that looked exactly like the others, while Lily and Sirius looked on and applauded and criticized his attempts. Remus settled into an armchair that he had conjured to match the sofa, and tried to parse the spell that would allow Peter to alphabetize the library. Peter sat on the floor flipping through _A Confectioner’s Source for Charms, Spells and Transfigurations_ , apparently swotting up for his first day of work at Honeyduke’s. “Aha,” Remus said eventually, waved his wand, and smiled with satisfaction as the books rearranged themselves in alphabetical order by author. He yawned, bid them goodnight, and disappeared into his room.

“Ha,” James said proudly a few minutes later, as a chair identical to the others appeared out of thin air. Lily and Sirius clapped. James Vanished the unsatisfactory chairs that he’d conjured and began looking at Lily as though she were the only one in the room. Sirius knew that look all too well, so he shook Peter’s arm, they said goodnight, and went to their own rooms.

 

Once ready for bed, and thanking Merlin for soundproofing charms, Sirius flopped down on his bed and turned to look out the window onto the lights of London. He was finally here, and he could hardly believe it.

 

In the morning, Sirius awoke to hear the gentle clink of spoons against cereal bowls as Lily and Remus ate early before heading off to St. Mungo’s. He showered and joined them, though his work at the Hog’s Head didn’t start for another six hours. Remus had the _Daily Prophet_ delivered, and they chatted about the local news (the Minister of Magic, Harold Minchum, wanted to increase the number of dementors around Azkaban; Remus and Sirius gave each other worried looks) while they ate. Lily and Remus went off to their first day of work, and Sirius entertained himself by flipping through the _Librarian’s Companion_ and finding a spell that, for some reason, organized the books by the first word in the third chapter. Having done this, he wandered back to his room and put up Quidditch posters until Peter and James woke up.

 

“You know what we should do, mate?” James asked, his mouth full of sausage.

“Have a party!” Sirius replied brightly.

James pointed at him with a fork. “Are you using Legilimency on me? Because you just read my mind.”

Sirius grinned. “Saturday night? Lily, Moony, and Wormtail are off all weekend, I’ve got Saturday off, and you don’t have practice Sunday.”

“How the hell do you know all that?” James demanded, then snorted when Sirius pointed to the neatly handwritten calendar on the kitchen wall. “Moony, of course. Brilliant, Saturday it is then. Wormy and you can take care of food and drinks, I’ll do the invites?”

Peter had brightened at the mention of food. “How do you feel about Acid Pops?”

James winced. He’d had a bad experience with Acid Pops once, and had never fully recovered. “Pads, you take care of drinks and actual food, and Wormy, you just bring whatever you can.”

 

By late morning, James had departed for Quidditch practice with the Appleby Arrows, Peter had set off for Honeyduke’s, and Sirius was getting ready for his first day of work at the Hog’s Head. Despite his new memories of applying for the job, Sirius could also remember going straight to work for the Order after school. He thought he liked this reality better – the flat was certainly more comfortable than the cramped quarters he’d been in the first time around. And working at a pub could only be fun, what with all the people, at least some of whom would be absolutely pissed.

 

By the end of the day, Sirius had changed his mind. What he hadn’t taken into account was that being around drunk people was considerably more fun when he himself had a buzz on, and the Hog’s Head was far from the party atmosphere that he had hoped for. In fact, he was bored to tears. When he complained about it that night, the rest of the Marauders took it in stride. When he complained about it every night for a week, they became visibly less patient.

“Have you considered looking for a new job?” Remus asked him. “There are Help Wanted adverts in the _Daily Prophet_ every day.”

Sirius was about to make a smart retort when Peter shoved the newspaper under his nose. “Look, there’s one for a Security Spell Consultant at Gringotts. You’d be good at that.”

“You would,” Remus concurred. “Put all your talents at breaking into places to good use.”

This brightened Sirius’ outlook a bit. He owled Gringotts that night, and by the next morning, had an interview.

 

As he entered Gringotts dressed in his best robes for the interview, a frazzled-looking wizard whose hair was still sizzling crossed paths with him, muttering something about “not going to be the goblin’s punching bag no more.” Sirius raised an eyebrow at the man, who grabbed his sleeve. “Don’t go in there, mate. It’s not safe. Those bloody goblins are looking for nice young wizards like you to lock up in vaults and get breathed fire at by dragons. It’s not safe, I tell you.”

Sirius shook him off and continued on into the bank. The problem with there being only one wizarding bank in London was that you got all kinds, and some were inherently suspicious of goblins. This view was somewhat shaken when the goblin Security Chief, who introduced himself as Gikl (“Giggle?” Sirius said, suppressing a laugh) grinned at him and said, “I see you met the previous Security Spell Consultant on your way in. Pay no mind.”

 

In fact, the unofficial job title was “Gringotts Test Thief,” but “Goblin Punching Bag” may have been more accurate. The best that could be said about the job was that Sirius was never bored, but after his brief stint at the Hog’s Head, that was enough. Sirius was required to break into the vaults in as creative a manner as he pleased, which was quite creative. After all, he’d been evading Filch for seven years; what was goblin magic compared to that? The answer was that goblin magic was far stronger than he expected, and he came home every night tired and burned, scratched, or concussed – but happy. This was the most fun he’d had in ages, and the only thing that could make it more fun was doing it with his best mate. He even brought James to work one day, and might have convinced him to make a career out of it, except that when Lily heard what they’d done, it launched the biggest fight of Lily and James’ relationship. She didn’t speak to him for three days, and it was only when he promised never to antagonize another goblin that she forgave him and allowed him to sleep in their bed again.

Lily did not approve of Sirius’ choice of jobs either, and in fact refused to heal him after the third time he showed up with missing fingers. Fortunately for Sirius, Remus was also an assistant Healer, and though he, too, agreed with Lily about the missing fingers and refused at first to heal them, puppy eyes worked considerably more effectively on him. Thus Remus found himself dedicating almost half an hour of nearly every day to repairing scratches, bruises, and burns of the Punching Bag, as Sirius insisted on calling himself, until Peter, to prove a point, began punching him at every opportunity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to my sister for a) Sirius' new job, and b) the title of the book Peter reads in this chapter.


	3. Sirius and Dragons

Being attacked by the dragon was more difficult than Sirius would have thought. The great dozy idiot actually sat and panted like a dog while Sirius tried to break into one of the vaults. “Provoke it,” one of the goblins hissed at him, and Sirius did a silly little dance that only made the dragon cock its head and look at him as though he’d taken leave of his senses – which, Sirius had to admit, was a possibility. After all, he was deliberately provoking a fire-breathing dragon into attacking him.

“I should have been a dragon tamer,” Sirius told Remus that night. “The vicious bastards love me.”  
Remus scoffed. “You think everyone loves you.”  
“I’m usually right,” Sirius replied. Remus scowled, and poked at a burn on the back of Sirius’ shoulder, making him jump. “Ow, Moony!”  
“Hold still, then.” But his fingers were gentle as they tilted Sirius’ head to the side. “If they loved you, they wouldn’t have burned you, and I wouldn’t have to be patching you up.”  
“It’s good practice for you. Anyway, I had to talk the stupid thing into attacking me. Even insulting its mother didn’t work. I had to moon it in the end.”  
“You didn’t,” Remus said, sounding as though he dreaded the answer.  
“I did,” Sirius said. “And I’ve got the burns for you to heal to prove it.”  
“No,” said Remus flatly. “Absolutely not.”  
Sirius gave him the puppy-dog eyes. Remus sighed. “Fine. But can you at least try to sound a little less pleased with yourself for getting your arse torched?”

In the end, the goblins had to replace the dragon with one more willing to attack. Even this one was hesitant to burn Sirius at first, but it responded much more quickly to the Clankers. For once, Sirius found himself visiting Remus and Lily at their work. Arriving at the lobby of St. Mungo’s covered in burns, supported by one of the more wizard-friendly goblins, Sirius collapsed onto a chair and tried to hold in a whimper. Lily was the first to arrive, following her Healer. She rolled her eyes and helped him down the corridor. “Send Remus to the Dai Llewellyn ward,” she said to the Welcome Witch as they passed her desk.  
Moments later, Remus came running into the room. “Sirius! Oh Merlin,” he said.  
“Merlin is right,” Lily said grimly. She was still holding most of Sirius’ weight. “Now help me get him onto the bed.”  
Under the eye of the supervising Healer, Remus and Lily gave Sirius a dose of Dreamless Sleep. Sirius reached out blindly as he felt himself sinking into oblivion, and a hand caught his and held it. 

When he came to, Remus was sitting by the bed, drowsing. “Moony,” Sirius said, and his friend’s head snapped up.  
“Sirius. Thank god. I wasn’t sure when you’d wake up, but this is a good sign.”  
Sirius looked down at himself, now burn-free, pain-free, and clad in a hospital gown. “I feel great. Did you and Lily do this?”  
Remus nodded. “After you fell asleep, we gave you a Blood-Replenishing Potion, managed to get the remains of your robes off, and pretty much put you in a bath of dittany.”  
“Well, thanks,” Sirius said. “You did a good job.”  
A brief smile. “It’s what we do. Now, do you want to explain why you came in looking like you’d walked into a grate without Floo Powder?”  
Sirius shrugged. “We got a new dragon at work,” he said.  
“And you, what, insulted its mother?” said Lily from the doorway.  
Sirius turned. “Yes, actually. It didn’t work on the last one.”  
Lily shook her head in exasperation. “Sirius, sometimes I think you’re actually stupid.”  
“Not stupid,” Remus corrected her, “reckless and unnecessarily brave.”  
“Aw, thanks Moony,” Sirius said brightly.  
“Not a compliment.”  
Lily shook her head again and pushed herself off of the doorframe. “James will be by with new clothes soon,” she said. “Try not to do anything ‘reckless and unnecessarily brave’ in the meantime.” She rolled her eyes at Remus and left.  
“You think I’m brave,” Sirius said, leaning back on his pillows with somewhat less swagger than he’d planned.  
“Unnecessarily brave, I believe I said,” replied Remus, helping him. “It’s a fine line between that and stupid, and honestly, you’re this close to crossing it with this job.”  
“Moony, I run around with a werewolf once a month. I became an unregistered Animagus in our fifth year. And this is what finally makes you think I’m reckless?”  
Remus sighed and sat back down. “It’s just…do you really need to taunt dragons for a living?”  
Sirius grinned. “Duh.”


	4. Your What With a What?

“Moony.”

Remus snapped out of his reverie. “Yeah?”

“Where were you? I’ve been trying to get your attention for ten minutes,” Sirius said.

Remus shrugged. “Just wondering about Tonks. She’d be five years old this year. Isn’t that weird?”

Sirius looked at him as though he’d taken leave of his senses. “Not really. I mean, she was way younger than us. What made you think about that?”

“It’s our anniversary. Kind of. About two decades early.”

Sirius was silent for a moment. “Anniversary?” he asked, finally.

“Yeah,” Remus said, then snorted quietly. “I feel old.”

Another pause. _“Anniversary?_ ”

Remus looked around at Sirius, who had turned white and dropped the orange he’d been holding. “Anniversary,” Remus said. “Oh right, you weren’t around for that.”

“You mean I’d died. And you got married?” Sirius asked. “To Tonks?”

“Yeah,” Remus said cautiously.

“Are you serious?” Sirius said.

“No, that’s you,” Remus said half-heartedly.

Sirius grabbed his shoulders. “Don’t joke about this, Lupin. You got married? And you didn’t tell me?”

“We were dead, and we’d started back at graduation. I thought there were other priorities,” Remus said.

Sirius sat down heavily. “Other priorities…. You got _married_. To a … to _Tonks._ What the hell, Remus?”

“To a what?” asked Remus suspiciously, having caught Sirius’ momentary stutter.

“A _Hufflepuff_ ,” Sirius said quickly. “A Hufflepuff, who, I might add, is currently five years old.”

“We’re only eighteen,” Remus pointed out. “I was thirty-seven when I married her.”

Sirius stared at him. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

Remus winced. “I should also tell you… we had a kid.”

Sirius stood and walked to the sink. Bracing his hands on either side, he repeated after Remus, “You had a kid.” His voice was quiet, but he thought his heart might be shaking. “A kid.”

There was an attempt at a smile from Remus. “You’re taking this a lot better than I thought you would.”

Sirius hitched a smile onto his face. “Did you at least name him after me?”

Remus slapped his forehead. “Damn it! I knew we shouldn’t have named him after his grandfather. Sirius Lupin would have been so much better!”

“Sounds good,” Sirius said weakly. “Too bad.”

There was a moment’s silence. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you right away.”

“I’m sorry I kinda freaked out. But this is big, Moony. I can’t believe you got married and had a kid. Lyall?”

Remus shook his head. “Teddy. He was a Metamorphagus, too.”

“Teddy. I’m sorry I wasn’t around to get to know him.” A pause. “I’m sorry _you_ weren’t around to get to know him.”

“Me too,” Remus sighed.

Another pause, longer this time. Then, “Do you think you’ll try to do it over?”

Remus looked up. Sirius was bouncing his orange from hand to hand, looking the type of unconcerned that he always did when he really was concerned about something. “I don’t know,” said Remus finally. “It depends on what happens in the next twenty years. She really only loved me because of the War and the Order, and without those things, who knows if we’ll ever even meet.”

“…I can introduce you,” Sirius pointed out, though it felt like a fist was crushing his heart as he said the words. “She is my cousin.” He bounced the orange again. “Though I’d wait a few years to declare your everlasting love for her. Her parents might not take it that well, her being a toddler and all.”

Remus smirked. “Thanks.”

“Any old time, Moony.”

“They might also not take it well that I’m a werewolf. _She_ might not take it that well this time around.”

Sirius scoffed. “It’s Andromeda. She was related to worse than werewolves. She won’t care. And Moony-“ here his face softened. “Whatever made her fall in love with you in the first place, she’ll see it again this time.”

“That was strangely deep, Pads, coming from you.”

“I’m full of hidden depths.”

James sauntered into the room and snatched the orange from Sirius with a Chaser’s ease. “Are we quite done talking about your depths, mate?” he asked.

“Well, _now_ we are,” said Sirius, pretending to be annoyed. He went to the fruit bowl to get another orange.

“Good,” James said, “because we’ve got a party to plan. I suggest that this one is Hogwarts-themed, since, you know, it’s almost August. We can do the invites as letters, get a ton of pumpkin juice, set up a Sorting Hat game, that kind of thing.”


	5. Marlene McKinnon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A wee bit of angst, and then some fluff (starring Padfoot, the amazing chocolate-fetching dog)

Sirius threw himself into the planning of the party with more force than usual. After all of his hard work, it was gratifying that the party came off so well, and nothing was more gratifying or funnier to James and Sirius (though for different reasons) than when their mock Sorting Hat sorted Remus into Hufflepuff.

“You rigged that,” Remus accused in a low voice while James tried on the hat (“GRYFFINDOR,” it shouted with no hesitation).

Sirius shrugged. “Maybe. Just trying to prove a point,” he said.

“What point, exactly?” Remus wanted to know, but Sirius was dashing away after Marlene McKinnon. “Just like the good old days?” Remus shouted after him. There was no response.

 

There was no response to his owl to Marlene McKinnon three days later, either. Sirius shrugged it off. It had only been a bit of fun, anyway. At least, that was what he told Remus. Actually, he’d barely managed to write her name on the parchment before giving up. What was the point, if it had only been a bit of fun?

So when Remus came home the next week and said, a little too casually, “I ran into Marlene today,” Sirius froze.

“Oh?” he said.

“She was a little upset because you never owled her after the party,” Remus said. “Now, since I clearly recall you saying that you _did_ owl her and she never owled you _back_ , I assume that you must have the world’s stupidest owl.”

“Must be,” Sirius said fervently.

“Mhm.” Remus was silent for a moment. “Now, since you don’t _have_ an owl, who’s the stupid one?”

Sirius thought quickly. “The stupid one would be the one I used from the Post Office, who I will be complaining to immediately.” He grabbed his cloak from the hook by the door and Apparated directly to the Leaky Cauldron, only half-glimpsing Remus’ raised eyebrow as he left.

 

He returned to the flat thirty minutes later, making sure to stop by the Post Office first to cement his alibi. He couldn’t quite bring himself to berate the postal worker for his imaginary missed delivery, but at least he smelled a bit like owls when he returned to the flat to see Remus sipping from a mug of tea. “Thanks for letting me know about the owl,” he said a bit lamely, and set off to the library to see if he could find a new breaking-and-entering spell for work the next day.

“Did you send another owl to Marlene?” Remus called after him.

Sirius returned to the kitchen, poking his head around the door. “Well, no. It’s awkward now, you see.”

“I don’t, but I’ll take your word for it,” Remus said calmly, returning to the book he was reading.

 

Unfortunately, Marlene did not see that it was awkward either. She sent her own owl the next day, and both Remus and Lily were present when it arrived at breakfast. They smirked at each other as Sirius, scowling, shooed the bird off the table. “Shouldn’t you let it take your reply?” asked Remus. “After all, you really can’t trust the ones from the Post Office after that last one.”

“The last one?” Lily asked. Remus filled her in as Sirius read the message from Marlene:

**Dear Sirius,**

**I was so sorry to hear that your owl got lost. Feel free to use another to owl me anytime.**

**Marlene**

This was followed by a smiley face that winked jovially at Sirius.

**P.S. You can also use this owl to write to me. Her name is Feathers.**

 

Feathers? Who the hell named their owl Feathers? He muttered this aloud, and looked up to find Lily and Remus laughing uproariously.

“It’s not funny,” he said loudly to be heard over their laughter, but this did nothing to stop them.

Finally, Remus sobered enough to ask, “Well, what are you going to write back?” Lily handed him a piece of parchment and they watched as he glared at them and sank down to put pen to paper.

 

_Marlene,_ he wrote, then paused. Despite years of practice at this, he found himself unsure of what to write next.

_My apologies for the stupid owl. Thanks for letting me use_ (he winced) _Feathers._

_Shall we meet up at the Three Broomsticks sometime?_

_Sirius_

 

He looked up again to find Lily watching him with a thoughtful look in her eye, and Remus determinedly scanning the newspaper.

“Happy?” he snapped, and rolled up the parchment and tied it to Feathers, who hooted and took off through the window. Lily merely raised her eyebrows.

 

That night, Sirius returned home to find Lily waiting in the living room, wand out, still dressed in her Healer’s robes. “Sit,” she said, and Sirius complied. She tossed a bit of parchment into his lap and began healing the day’s injuries. This was the first time she’d offered healing since his third day on the job, and Sirius was surprised enough not to ask questions. Besides, he was intrigued by (though somewhat nervous about) the piece of parchment, which had his name in Marlene’s handwriting.

 

**Sirius,**

**The Three Broomsticks sounds lovely. Tomorrow at seven?**

**Marlene**

(This was followed by another winking face that Sirius found heavily unnerving.)

 

“You can use Archimedes to respond, if you want,” Lily said.

“Thanks, yeah, that’d be great,” said Sirius.

Lily finished healing the last scrape and turned him to face her. “Are you sure? Because it doesn’t sound ‘great.’ It sounds like you’re using her because she’s there, and the person you really want isn’t available. And if that’s the case, Sirius, stop it. She might not be the brightest witch ever, but she’s my friend. No!” -  because Sirius had opened his mouth to respond – “And so are you. Stop wasting both of your time,” she finished decisively, and left the room.

Sirius had been sitting there for fifteen minutes, trying to decide what to do, when Remus emerged from his room. “Pads, I didn’t know you were home. Do you need healing?” he asked.

Sirius shook his head. “Lily took care of it,” he said. Remus raised an eyebrow. “I know, I was as surprised as you are. I think she just wanted to talk about the Marlene thing.”

“The Marlene thing?” Remus repeated.

“Yeah, you know, stay away from my friend and all that.”

“That’s odd,” Remus mused. “She’s never been this protective before. You think graduating has something to do with it?”

“Probably,” Sirius agreed, and went to knock on Lily’s door. “Can I still borrow Archimedes?” he asked when she answered.

“Why?” she asked bluntly.

“To tell Marlene I’ll meet up with her tomorrow night.” When she pursed her lips, he sighed. “It’s rude to dump someone over owl,” he said. She rolled her eyes and nodded, and he set off to the kitchen to write a response and send it.

 

The next night, Sirius met up with Marlene at the Three Broomsticks. She greeted him with a hug, but when he didn’t return it, pulled back. “It’s like that, is it?” she asked, and he nodded. “Any particular reason?”

“Lily says not to mess with her friends,” Sirius said.

“Well, that would be a great excuse if I believed it,” Marlene said. “Is there someone else?”

Sirius shrugged. “Not realistically. And Lily did say not to use you.”

Marlene nodded thoughtfully. “Well, I don’t mind being used. Not tonight.”

 

When Sirius got home early the next morning, Lily and James were sitting at the table, silent, cups of tea in front of them. Sirius, who had hoped to sneak in before anyone else was up, deflated.

“Have a seat, mate,” James said. Sirius sat. “Have a good night?” James asked genially.

“Yes, actually,” Sirius said. “Is that all, because I need a shower and a nap.”

“No,” Lily said sharply. “It’s not all. What happened with Marlene?”

“Oh, what do you think happened, Lily?” Sirius said. “And for the record, she knew the whole situation and instigated anyway.”

Lily brightened. “You told her everything?”

Sirius rolled his eyes. “There’s nothing to tell, so no, I didn’t tell her anything. I didn’t have to. She guessed.”

James was looking between Lily and Sirius as though watching a Quidditch match. “So there is something? Who is it? Do you know, Lils?”

“No, she doesn’t know anything,” Sirius snapped. “She just thinks she does, and she’s wrong. The only thing there is to know is that Marlene and I are never going to work. That’s all. That’s all I know, that’s all Marlene knows, and she still wanted to sleep with me. So now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to shower and go to sleep, and I’ll thank you to keep your big fat noses out of it!”

He stomped off to his room, tripping over Peter, who blinked sleepily at him and muttered something about it being too early for fighting. He could practically hear Lily and James exchanging significant looks, and he didn’t want any part of that.

Despite his expressed wish to sleep, Sirius lay awake staring at the ceiling for what seemed like hours after his shower. Finally, there was a soft knock on his door, and Remus poked his head in.

“I heard you had a fight with Lily and James,” he said cautiously. Sirius shrugged vaguely. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really, thanks,” Sirius said, still staring at the ceiling. “Don’t you have to go to work?”

Remus made a face. “It’s the full moon tomorrow, so I asked for a couple days off.”

Sirius propped himself up on an elbow and took a good look at his friend. Remus was pale, thinner than usual, and looked even more tired than Sirius felt. Sirius patted the bed beside him, and Remus came all the way into the room and sat. “Are we going to the Shrieking Shack?” Sirius asked.

Remus nodded. “Dumbledore said I could keep using it. You don’t have to come, though.”

Sirius scoffed. “Of course I will. Prongs and Wormy will too, you know that.”

There was a short silence, and Remus brought a knee up to his chest and rested his chin on it. “There’s this new treatment that my boss wants me to try. It’s called the Wolfsbane Potion, and it’s been really successful in tests so far.”

Sirius stared at him. “What do you think?”

Remus sighed. “I think it’s worth a try. It’ll make the full moon a lot more boring for all of us if it works, but that might not be a bad thing. Boring can be good sometimes.”

“I generally don’t agree with that, but in this case you could be right,” Sirius said.

Remus smiled. It looked painful. “So are you going to tell me what you were arguing about with Lily and James?” he asked.

Sirius shrugged. “The Marlene thing.”

“So there is still a Marlene thing,” Remus said slowly. “That’s cool.”

“No, it’s the lack of a Marlene thing when I slept with her that really upset Lily and James,”

There was a pause. “No, I don’t get it. You slept with her, but it’s not a thing?” Remus asked.

“Exactly. I slept with her once, it wasn’t horrible, it’ll probably never happen again. I think Lily and James have a problem with casual sex,” Sirius said reflectively. Remus made a choking noise. “And so do you,” Sirius accused.

“I do not,” Remus protested. “It’s none of my business who you sleep with. Who anyone sleeps with.”

Sirius made a face. “Prude.”

Remus rolled his eyes. “Fine, yes, whatever. I’m a prude.”

Sirius flopped back down on the bed. Remus scooted back to lean against the wall and closed his eyes.

“Moony?”

“Yeah?”

“Did you sleep with anyone before Tonks? You know, in the …”

“Last life? Yes, in fact, I did. I’m not that much of a prude.”

Sirius sat back up. “Who?”

“Does it matter?” Remus asked.

“Yes. Was it someone we know?”

Remus sighed. “No. It was just a . . . a guy I met at a nightclub,” he finished defensively, opening his eyes.

“A guy? Really?” Sirius asked, suddenly much more awake. Remus didn’t make eye contact. “Come on, you know I’m not judging you. I’m just curious.”

Remus barked out a laugh. “Yeah, bi-curious. You better not judge me, not after hooking up with a third of the boys in our year.”

Sirius could feel his cheeks heating. “Shut up. Not a third, and I never slept with any of them. So what did you think?”

Remus blushed. “It wasn’t horrible, it just never happened again. Can we talk about something else?”

“Fine, let’s talk about the fact that you’re bi and you never told me.”

“I’m not bi, I’m gay,” Remus corrected him. “And I never told you because you never needed to know. And I’m regretting ever telling you, so shut up or talk about something else.”

Sirius shut up. For a minute, anyway, which was about as long as he ever shut up. “So this Wolfsbane potion, what does it do?”

Remus, who had closed his eyes again, groaned and flopped over onto the bed. “Makes me sleepy.”

“Have you taken it already?” Sirius asked.

“No, this is just the usual fatigue,” Remus replied. “If I take the potion, it’ll be even worse. But I’ll sleep through the full moon, so I can’t hurt anyone.”

Sirius snorted. “You never hurt anyone anyway. You’re right, this sounds boring.” He looked over at his friend, already half-asleep. “But if you think it’s the right thing to do, boring is fine,” he amended.

Remus hummed quietly in acknowledgment. Sirius felt himself sinking into dreams. “It’ll all be ok, Moony,” he muttered.

 

When Sirius woke hours later, Remus was still curled up at the end of his bed, frowning slightly even in sleep, looking thinner and paler than ever. Sirius picked his way out of bed, careful not to disturb his friend. At the door, he was met by Peter, who was apparently about to knock. Sirius put a finger to his lips and pulled the other boy away down the hall. Peter, to his credit, only nodded and followed him.

“What’s up?” Sirius asked.

“Is Moony ok?” Peter countered. “I tried to check on him, but he wasn’t in his room.”

“Yeah, he’s just tired. Came into my room to talk and ended up falling asleep,” Sirius said.

Peter nodded again. “So how was Marlene?”

Sirius groaned. “Not this again. Did Lily tell you to ask me?”

“No,” Peter protested. “I just wondered. Lily actually told me not to ask.”

This surprised Sirius, as Lily, in his experience, was not one to let things go easily. “Really?”

“Yeah, she said that you needed time to accept yourself. She was really vague, actually,” Peter said, sounding unconcerned.

“Accept myself? I’ll show her accept myself,” Sirius muttered. He headed to the kitchen to make himself a snack.

“What does that mean?” Peter wanted to know.

“I don’t know, Worms. Marlene was fine, just… she was fine.”

Peter seemed to accept this. Sirius concentrated on pouring cereal into the bowl instead of all over the floor (he was still getting used to the boxes).

“James said there was someone else,” Peter said, wincing in sympathy as Sirius knocked his head on the fridge; he had been getting out the milk.

“Well, James was wrong,” Sirius said savagely, splashing milk all over the counter. “Bugger… _Tergeo_!”

Peter was silent for a moment. Then, a quiet “If you say so, Padfoot,” and Sirius could hear his footsteps fading down the hall. Sirius let himself slump back against the fridge. What was wrong with him today? He’d yelled at three of his four best friends, turned down the perfect friends-with-benefits situation…. He turned into a dog. It was a little easier to like himself in this form. Though it was a bit messier to eat cereal.

 

Remus emerged from Sirius’ room a few hours later, yawning widely but looking a bit more rested than usual. “You’ve got a really comfortable bed,” he told Sirius, who was still in dog form. Sirius barked and circled Remus’ feet twice, then went and jumped on the door. Remus rolled his eyes. “If you were in human form, you could take yourself for a walk,” he pointed out. Sirius cocked his head. Remus sighed. “Fine. Let me get a nutrition bar or something to go.”

 

Ten minutes later, they were in one of the parks near the Houghton Building, and Sirius was romping happily across the grass. Remus even cracked a smile when he chased a squirrel up a tree, and that, Sirius thought, made it totally worth it. By the time that they headed back, the sun was sinking rapidly toward the horizon, and Sirius had tired himself out enough to sleep well that night. On the way back, he leaned against Remus, who scratched between his shoulder blades. “You’re welcome,” Remus said.

 

Once they had returned, Sirius pushed Remus towards the sofa, onto which he sank gratefully and closed his eyes. Turning briefly back to human, Sirius retrieved a chocolate bar from the fridge, then dropped it in Remus’ lap. “Good dog,” said Remus with a smile, wiping the slobber off with his robes.


	6. The Conversation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A very short chapter in which Sirius loses his trademark confidence, for once in his life.

Arriving at home early one day in late September, Sirius wandered down the corridor and was about to enter the kitchen when lowered voices stopped him. More specifically, he heard Remus saying “he’ll never love me back,” which caught his attention sharpish.

Remus continued. “He could never love a werewolf.”

“He doesn’t care about that, you know he doesn’t,” Lily was saying soothingly, but this appeared to have no effect on Remus, who said:

“He doesn’t _now_ , but he could never actually _love_ one. You know that, Lily, just as well as I do.”

“You’re being stubborn,” Lily sighed (and Sirius rolled his eyes – it was a bit of pot calling the kettle black for Lily Evans to call anyone stubborn). “Look, just _talk_ to him, it can’t hurt…”

“It could ruin everything, Lily, and you know it. Just… don’t say anything to him, alright? I’ll deal with it in my own way.”

“Denial, you mean,” Lily noted. “Fine, I won’t say anything. But you should.”

Then there was the sound of water being poured into a pot, and it was obvious that Remus had started making dinner. Lily sighed and joined him.

Sirius leaned against the wall of the corridor. Who was this who had caught Remus’ attention, and how dare he not love Remus just because he was a werewolf? He wanted Remus to be happy, of course he did, but how could he possibly be happy with someone who had a werewolf bias? And who could it be? Probably someone from work, and that would change their whole dynamic as a group. It was bad enough letting Lily become an honorary Marauder, how could someone new be brought in without messing everything up? Oh, this would just ruin everything.

What was worse, it seemed to Sirius that after the conversation with Remus, Lily constantly wore a smug smile around the flat. He put this down to Remus “telling her things,” as he put it to Peter one day. “And mark my words, now she thinks she’s better than us.”

“You’re just jealous that James gets along better with her these days than you,” Peter said, nodding sagely.

“ _Locomotor Wibbly_!” Sirius responded forcefully.

In retrospect, it was unsurprising that Peter had taken Lily’s side; the boy looked up to her and adored her with every fibre of his being. Sirius wished he could talk to Remus about this instead, but he was unwilling to confront his friend with the knowledge that he’d overheard their conversation. Besides, Remus apparently had someone else on his mind, and it was hardly likely that he’d want to talk to Sirius about it. He hadn’t, after all, confided in Sirius in the first place.

Yes, it was probably someone from St. Mungo’s, and he was already destroying their friendship from the inside out.


	7. Slytherin-Hufflepuff Quidditch Match

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I try my best to describe Quidditch; Sirius tries his best to be a good big brother.

October arrived, bringing with it gusts of wintery air. The week before Halloween, the Marauders readied themselves to return to Hogwarts to see the Slytherin-Hufflepuff Quidditch match. Though they were ostensibly going to cheer for Regulus, as they gathered in the living room before Apparating to Hogsmeade, Sirius noted that each of them wore Gryffindor hats or scarves; even now, House pride dictated that they cancel out the Slytherin pennants each of them carried. Arriving one by one in the main street of Hogsmeade, they walked, laughing and talking, up to the castle. Sirius and James Transfigured Remus’ pennant to Hufflepuff colors from behind his back.

 

When Remus finally noticed, he rolled his eyes at Sirius. “I’d rather cheer for Slytherin than Hufflepuff, you know,” he said. Sirius raised an eyebrow. Checking to be sure that the others were engaged in conversation, Remus continued: “It was always a bit of a sore point between me and Dora, you know – she thought Gryffindors were reckless and thoughtless, and I may have said something about how Hufflepuff was the House where you went if no one else would take you.”

 

“Wow, Moony, that’s harsh!” exclaimed Sirius. “Even I wouldn’t say that out loud.”

 

Remus gave him a look of stark disbelief. “You did say that out loud, several times, while we were in school. Often to Hufflepuffs.”

 

Sirius shrugged. “You can’t hold that against me – I was young and stupid.”

 

Remus muttered something that sounded like “and you aren’t now?” but Sirius pretended not to hear. Instead, he tucked his arm under Remus’ and began skipping, dragging Remus along with him.

 

They were greeted at the gates by Professor McGonagall, who withstood enthusiastic hugs from Sirius and James, returned Lily’s, and escorted them up to the Quidditch stadium. They were seated with the professors and staff, and McGonagall gave them a brief, stern lecture about how they would be expected to behave themselves, Mr. Black and Mr. Potter. They solemnly promised to be models of good behaviour, and McGonagall swept away to oversee the announcer.

 

The players kicked off, and Regulus and the Hufflepuff Seeker circled high above the rest, occasionally flitting down to avoid a Bludger. Regulus pulled off an excellent Wronski Feint, causing the other Seeker to just barely avoid crashing into the stands; at that, Sirius forgot all decorum and stood up on his seat to cheer. “That’s my little brother!” he yelled to anyone who would listen, and Remus had to pull him back down.

 

“Yes, yes, we’re very proud,” Remus assured him, “but shut up before McGonagall kicks us out.” And in fact McGonagall was giving him the evil eye from four rows down.

 

The Slytherin team was given a penalty for stooging (that is, all three Chasers were in the scoring area at once), but otherwise Hufflepuff lagged behind; first twenty points, then by thirty. They were sixty points behind when the Hufflepuff Seeker went into a dive, and Regulus streaked across the field to chase a glint of gold behind the referee’s ear. The referee ducked just in time, and the two Seekers collided, but it was Regulus who emerged from the mess holding aloft the Snitch.

 

Half of the stands erupted in cheers; the faculty and staff applauded, and the Slytherin team swarmed their Seeker. Sirius threw his arms around his friends, and they jumped up and down. “That’s my brother! That’s my brother!” he chanted.

 

The brother in question was being borne back to the castle by the team, but he did manage to give a wave in Sirius’ direction from the midst of the crowd.


	8. Wolfsbane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angsty Sirius; Remus takes Wolfsbane Potion

A week before the February full moon, Remus started taking the Wolfsbane potion. After the first dose, he looked grey and drawn, and confined himself to his room. He wouldn’t allow Sirius (or Padfoot) in, but he let Lily deliver an anti-vomiting potion from work. “He can’t get sick, or the potion won’t work,” Lily confided to Sirius, who had set up camp outside his friend’s door. On his rare trips to the washroom, Remus could barely work up the energy to give a reassuring smile, which was usually his trademark when he wasn’t feeling well.

 

Lily brought home the second dose in a decanter that smoked ominously when opened. Remus opened his door just enough to receive the potion, then closed it again, leaving Lily and Sirius hovering outside. They exchanged worried looks; Lily went to help James with dinner, and Sirius sat down again in the corridor. Not ten minutes later, Remus opened the door again with a lurch; Sirius caught him just before he fell. “Lily, we’re going to St. Mungo’s,” Sirius roared down the corridor, and Disapparated on the spot.

 

Side-Along Apparition did nothing for Remus’ complexion, and when they arrived in the waiting room, he collapsed into one of the chairs. Sirius left him there so he could explain the situation to the Welcome Witch, but looked over so often he was sure it looked like he had an uncontrollable twitch.

 

“He took a potion – I need help getting him to the third floor – it was prescribed for him, but he had a bad reaction-“

 

“Just calm down, dear,” said the annoyingly upbeat Welcome Witch. “They’ll sort him out.” And she called for two Healers to help carry a rapidly failing Remus to the third floor.

 

By the time they got to the first floor, he had lost consciousness, and the Healers were levitating him. Lily and James caught up with them on the staircase, and Lily muttered something about “evelators” as they climbed the last flight of stairs.

 

“What did he take?” asked a Healer as she conjured a stretcher to levitate him down the corridor to a ward.

 

Sirius hesitated, but Lily responded at once, “Wolfsbane Potion. This was his second dose.”

 

Sirius half-expected the Healer to recoil, to say something about him needing to be on the first floor with the rest of the Creature-Induced Injuries, but she just nodded and repeated the information to the quill floating along beside her. Lily listed the other potions Remus had taken in the last three days, and Sirius remembered that this floor was where she spent most of her days; of course she would know the routine.

 

The Healer settled Remus on a bed and Vanished the stretcher. She performed a Full Body Scan, nodding as red and green lights appeared over Remus’ chest and head. “Well, he’s allergic to bat spleen,” she said finally. “And there’s a small amount in the Wolfsbane Potion. That’s the good news – that we know what caused this.”

 

“And the bad news?” Lily prompted.

 

“Well, it’s only a week before the full moon, and his body chemistry’s already changing,” said the Healer. “We can’t just flush out the bat spleen because it’s already been absorbed, and the approaching full moon makes everything more difficult.”

 

“Will you be able to fix him?” Sirius demanded, having kept his mouth shut for as long as possible.

 

The Healer exchanged looks with Lily. “I hope so,” she said at last. With that, she left the room. Lily followed, saying something about observing.

 

Sirius began pacing. James sat by the bedside, face white, hands twisting in his sweater. “I’m going to let Peter know we’re here,” he said at last, and hurried out of the room.

 

Sirius took his place by the bed. “Come on, Moony, wake up,” he said at last, desperately. “Look, we need you to be the reasonable one for a long time yet. Lily needs you to be her friend so she’s not alone with us slobs. James needs you to be his conscience, Peter needs you to look up to. And I need you, Remus, I really do… so wake the hell up, you can’t die on me now… you just can’t, because…. Because I love you. And even if you don’t feel the same way, I need you in my life. So please, please wake up.” His voice cracked. He heard shuffling feet from the doorway, and looked over. There stood Lily and James. Lily was wearing a huge smile, and James a dumbfounded look. He closed his eyes. “How much did you hear?” he asked wearily, knowing from Lily’s face that the answer would be –

 

“Almost all of it,” she said gleefully. “And he’s going to be ok, they found the antidote!”

 

Sirius jumped to his feet. “Really?”

 

“Really, and now you two will be together, and –“

 

“No,” Sirius interrupted. “No, because I know he doesn’t love me back, and so you two won’t tell him. Swear it!”

 

So ferocious was the look on his face that both of them promised, though Lily looked crestfallen. She was prevented from saying anything else by the arrival of the Healer, who tipped another potion down Remus’ throat. “He’ll sleep for a while,” said the Healer, and patted Sirius’ shoulder in a reassuring manner, “but he’ll be ok.”

 

Sirius resumed his place by the bed, watching as Remus’ color returned and his breathing fell into a pattern that indicated deep sleep. Lily drew up a chair beside him. “So you love him,” she started, but Sirius broke in.

 

“What does it matter?” he asked in a defeated tone. “He loves someone else, I know he does.” At the sight of her expression, he continued, “I overheard your conversation the other day.”

 

Lily looked peeved. “It could still happen,” she said, but Sirius shook his head. “It could! You’ve been friends for ages, sometimes that’s how the strongest relationships start. Just forget about what you overheard.”

 

“I can’t, Lily,” Sirius said. “Besides, just because you’re in one doesn’t make you a relationship expert. You’re with James, for Merlin’s sake.”

 

Lily looked briefly as though he may have had a point. “Fine. Be miserable, then. But I’m glad you at least admitted your feelings to yourself. Took you long enough.” And she stood up and left.

 

Sirius took Remus’ hand and waited, trying to convince himself that this was what _friends_ did; they waited in hospital until you woke up from a near-death experience. A few hours later, his patience was rewarded; the fingers in his hand twitched, and Remus’ eyelids fluttered open. “Wha-?”

 

“You had a bad reaction to the potion, you’re in St. Mungo’s,” Sirius told him. “Turns out you’re allergic to one of the ingredients.

 

Remus groaned and closed his eyes again. “Damn. I was really hoping it would work.”

 

Sirius made a sympathetic noise. Just then, the Healer bustled in. “You’re still here?” she asked incredulously. “Visiting hours were over hours ago!”

 

Sirius jumped up guiltily, but Remus’ hand anchored him. “Sorry,” he said, not sorry at all.

 

She sighed. “I’m happy you were here when he woke up, but you’ve really got to go. Come back tomorrow morning.”

 

He looked at Remus, who squeezed his hand and nodded. “I’ll see you tomorrow then,” Sirius said, and let go.

 

The next day, Sirius was at St. Mungo’s at eight o’clock sharp, and paced the waiting room until nine, when visiting hours began. Lily was the one to lead him down the corridors. She smirked as she let him in, and Sirius shot her a dirty look as he proceeded into the ward where Remus was sitting up in bed, tilting his face to the sunshine. He smiled as Sirius drew up a chair near his bedside.

 

“You seem to be feeling better,” Sirius noted as he sat down.

 

“I really am,” Remus admitted. “Thanks for bringing me here last night. The Healers said you saved my life.”

 

Sirius felt his face heat. “Nah, you would have been fine. It’s lucky they figured out what you were allergic to, and what the antidote was.”

 

Remus gave him a half-smile that made his stomach burst into butterflies. “Anyway, I’m glad you’re here. They wouldn’t check me out –“

 

“Until there was someone to take you home, that’s right, Mr. Lupin,” said a Healer just entering the ward, and Remus rolled his eyes at Sirius.

 

Sirius stood to the side as the Healer performed a few scans and pronounced Remus healthy enough to leave. They both had to sign a form, and then Remus changed into clothes that Lily had brought. Finally, they were ready to leave, and Sirius Apparated them home. Remus swayed on the spot, so Sirius pushed him towards the couch, where he sank gratefully.

 

“You’re still tired,” Sirius observed.

 

“It’s still nearly the full moon,” Remus pointed out. “No matter how well they patched me up, I’m still going to have my furry little problem to deal with.”

 

Sirius flopped onto the couch next to him. “It’s a shame that potion doesn’t work for you,” he said.

 

Remus shrugged. “The assistant potions master said that he can alter it so that there’s no bat spleen,” he said, and Sirius sat up straight.

 

“That’s great! So can you still take it this month?”

 

“No, it’ll take him at least a few weeks to figure out different ingredients.” Remus covered his face and groaned. “It’ll taste even worse, probably.”

 

“At least you won’t nearly die when you take it,” Sirius pointed out, and Remus nodded. They sat in silence for a moment, and then Remus pushed himself up off the couch.

 

 “I’m going to lie down for a while.”

 

Sirius watched his friend amble down the hall, and wondered exactly how he was going to survive, knowing as he did that he was in love with someone else.


	9. Trapped

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius discovers one of the downsides to his job

Sirius’ job was not all dragon-training. The goblins had three types of defense against thieves: Containment spells, Deterrent (which Sirius referred to as “revenge”) spells, and the dragon for the lower vaults. The dragon and the Deterrent spells were most heavily relied upon, and it was nearly a month before Sirius first ran across a Containment spell. It was a version of the Incarcerous Charm, and, when triggered by the opening of a vault door without the presence of a goblin, caught the would-be thief in a heavy net. The goblins took their time freeing him, too; it was nearly dinnertime before they stopped pointing and laughing and let him go. 

 

The second time Sirius encountered a Containment spell, on a rainy day in April, it was one of the goblin specialties which sucked the victim into a vault. It hadn’t been one of Sirius’ best days to start with (he had woken up late with a headache and been running behind ever since), and when Gikl told him to stroke the vault door with a finger, Sirius did so with rather ill-humor, knowing that the experience to follow could not possibly be a fun one. 

 

He was right. The door sucked him through into the vault, crushing the air out of him as it did so, and threw him against the far wall of the vault. A quick Lumos showed that he was in an empty cavern – though he might have guessed that from the lack of clanking when he was thrown into the room. With little hope, he ran a finger down the door; there was no effect. Sirius sank down against a wall and rested his throbbing head against the cool stone. No doubt the goblins would be giggling outside, waiting to hear explosions or cursing. Well, they could just wait. 

 

About twenty minutes later, Sirius stood, changing his mind. It was just possible that the goblins were going to keep him in here until they had evidence that he had tried to escape. So he threw increasingly strong Reductor Curses at the door, then the walls, then the ceiling, just for good measure. This accomplished nothing. Feeling as though he had done enough, Sirius sat back down and waited. 

 

And waited.

 

And waited.

 

Finally, he cast a Tempus Dictus Charm. It had been three hours. His stomach rumbled. He ignored this; some long-buried memory emerged of going days without food, though that had been while chasing the nobler pursuit of protecting his godson. Now, it was just for a job that he was liking less by the moment. 

 

Eight hours after he had been thrown into the vault, Sirius was getting worried. The goblins would be closing the bank for the day, and it was just possible that they were going to make him stay here overnight. What was worse, the vaults had magic-suppressing qualities that prevented him from conjuring up chairs, beds or blankets; the best he could do was an Aguamenti. 

 

Ten hours after being trapped, Sirius was relatively sure that he was going to be here all night. So he transformed into Padfoot and curled up in a corner near the door, where he would be sure to wake if someone decided to let him out. 

 

Twenty-four hours after getting stuck, Sirius was waiting impatiently by the door, tapping his foot (he’d transformed back to human so that the goblins who were surely about to come fetch him wouldn’t report him to the Ministry for being an unregistered Animagus). No one came.

 

Thirty hours of being trapped had taken their toll. Sirius had conjured water, but was unable to call up food, and he was now really hungry. For lack of anything better to do, he transformed back into Padfoot and slept. 

 

According to his wand, he had been trapped for two days and six hours when the door suddenly dissolved without warning. Whipping out his wand and jumping to his feet, Sirius nearly hexed the goblin who had opened the door and was now beckoning him to come out, as though he needed urging. Once out of the vault, he turned to the goblin. “What took so long?” he asked.   
“We forgot you were in there,” the goblin replied with a grin. “Lucky for you that your friend noticed you were missing.”

 

They rode the death-wish cart up to the ground floor; as Sirius emerged into the lobby, a pale-looking Remus hurried towards him and grabbed his arms. “Are you ok?” Remus asked anxiously, scanning him as though looking for injuries. Sirius nodded. “Thank God,” Remus continued, and kept a hand on his elbow as he steered them through the crowd and outside. “It took a whole day for them to even admit that you worked here, never mind that you might have gotten trapped in one of the vaults. I’m sorry it took so long to get you out.”  
“It’s ok, Moony,” Sirius said, “Thanks for getting me out in the end.”  
Remus stopped in the middle of the cobblestone street, causing Sirius, who he was still towing, to run into him. He turned to face him. “I will always –“ he said, and then stopped. “Never mind.”  
Sirius only raised an eyebrow. “Can we go home now? I’m starved.”  
Remus turned, red-faced, and pulled Sirius along the street to the Leaky Cauldron’s courtyard, where he Apparated them to the flat.


	10. H.A.R.E.S.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lily and Remus study for exams; Sirius takes responsibility for Remus' well-being; thoughts on Patronuses

Remus and Lily were scheduled to take their H.A.R.E.S. (Healer’s Assessments of Responsibility and Expertise under Stress) in early June, which would allow them to become full Healers almost a year ahead of schedule. Because of the early test, both of them started spending almost all their time either at work or studying.

 

Sirius was under the impression that Remus had been studying for eight hours without a break. This was simply unacceptable. He knocked at Remus’ open door, but his friend kept muttering to himself while staring at the book on his desk. Sirius knocked again, louder. “What?” asked Remus this time, still with his eyes on the book.

 

“Do you want some dinner?” Sirius asked.

 

“I’ll be right out,” Remus responded.

 

“You said that three hours ago at dinner time,” Sirius accused.

 

“Just a minute,” Remus said, still not looking up from the book.

 

Sirius rolled his eyes and retreated. He met James in the hallway, shaking his head. “Lily won’t eat either?” guessed Sirius.

 

“She hasn’t eaten or slept for two days,” James said defeatedly.

 

“Remus hasn’t either,” Sirius said. “So what do we do?”

 

James leaned against the wall and thought. “We could give them Nutrition Potions,” he said finally. “That would at least give them some fuel to run on.”

 

Sirius nodded, and they went to the kitchen cabinet where the potions were kept. Nutrition potions were nasty, glutinous things, and he made a face as he seized two from the cupboard and handed one to James. James went off to the room he shared with Lily, and Sirius padded back down the hall to Remus’ room.

 

“One last chance to eat actual food,” he threatened, waving the potion under Remus’ nose.

 

Remus made a face and pushed away the vial. “I’ll eat in a minute,” he said.

 

“I’ll believe that when it happens,” Sirius said. “Put down the book. You’re either drinking this disgusting potion or eating an actual meal.”

 

Remus groaned and broke eye contact with the book for the first time. “Fine.”

 

Sirius trailed him into the kitchen, where Remus emptied a take-away container into a bowl and started eating it. “Aren’t you going to heat that up?” he asked.

 

Remus gave him a pained look. “I really need to be studying,” he said.

 

“You really need to be eating,” Sirius corrected. “Otherwise you won’t remember any of the studying, and what good will that do you during the test?”

 

“Fine, but I left my wand in my room and I don’t have time to go and get it,” Remus said.

 

Sirius huffed. “You could just ask _me_ to do the Heating Charm,” he pointed out.

 

Remus pointedly took another bite. “No, you burn things.”

 

Sirius handed him his wand. “Fine, do it yourself, you big baby.”

 

Remus cast the Heating Charm and handed back the wand. “Thank you.” Sirius nodded. “Do you really have to watch me eat?”

 

“Yes, or you’ll just go back to studying. What’s so important about these rabbits anyway?”

 

Remus sighed. “It’s called _H.A.R.E.S._ , as you well know, and it means the difference between being an assistant Healer and a full Healer for the next year. So it’s kind of important, and I will fail them if you don’t let me go back to studying!” he said defiantly, finishing off the last bit of take-away.

 

Sirius shrugged. “Fine, you have two hours, and then I’m taking away your books and throwing Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder into your room. And the library, if I have to.”

 

As it turned out, he didn’t have to, but only because Remus fell asleep on his book about twenty minutes later. James helped him get Remus onto the bed, and Sirius smiled to himself as he turned off the light and left the room. Sleeping Remus was kind of adorable.

 

The next day, Sirius was eating dinner with Lily, James, and Peter when a Patronus arrived from Remus to tell Lily about a last-minute H.A.R.E.S. review session at the hospital. Instead of jumping up as Sirius had expected her to do, Lily stared at the Patronus as it evaporated, and continued to gaze at the place it had been until James jogged her arm. “Lils?” he prompted.

 

“Oh… yeah…” Lily said, then glanced at Sirius. “It’s just… did Remus’ Patronus look any different to you?”

 

Sirius, his mouth full, shook his head.

 

“James?”

 

James frowned. “I never see his Patronus, but the snout looked…” he trailed off.

 

“Rounder, right?” Lily said. James nodded. “And the ears… well, I better be off, anyway.” She disappeared down the hall. James regarded Sirius thoughtfully until Sirius threw a bit of chicken at him.


	11. Picked

On a rainy May evening, the Marauders were sitting down to dinner when a large barn owl swooped in through the open kitchen window, scattering them all with rain, and landed in front of James. They all looked on as James took the letter from its outstretched leg and opened it. The owl took off immediately, once again spraying water in its wake. James read the letter and dropped his fork with a clang. “I – they – but –“ he stuttered, which was such an unusual occurrence that Remus and Sirius looked at each other with concern. James wordlessly handed the letter to Lily, who read it, squealed, and threw her arms around him. “Congratulations!” she said.

 

“Why? What happened?” Sirius asked at last, having held his tongue for as long as possible.

 

“I made the national Quidditch team!” James exclaimed, over Lily’s shoulder. “The recruiter saw me play last week, and he wants me to be a chaser for the British National team!”

 

The others made various exclamations of surprise and congratulations; Sirius clapped him on the back. “That’s amazing, mate!” he said. “You’re going to be great!”

 

“Yeah, you know it,” James said, reaching out to high-five him.

 

The rest of the meal was eaten in snatches while theorizing about Britain’s chances for making it to the World Cup. “Well, now they have one of the best Chasers in the world, so that makes it more likely,” James pointed out.

 

After dinner, Lily left for a shift at St. Mungo’s, and James and Sirius picked through a copy of _Which Broomstick_ , trying to decide which broom the national team would be playing on in the coming season. Remus and Peter supervised the washing up, as Remus was trying to teach Peter household spells. Having decided that the Nimbus 1500 was the most likely candidate, Sirius sat up abruptly. “We should go out to celebrate!” he said.

 

“Yeah!” enthused James, and bounded out to the kitchen to invite Peter and Remus.

 

Remus at first refused; “I’ve got to study,” he said. But they wore him down, and after an hour’s deliberation, he finally agreed. Peter, of course, agreed at once, and in an hour’s time they were headed to the Three Broomsticks.

 

Sirius bought the first round, and they drank to James’ success. Less than half-way through his drink, Remus stood up. “I’ve got to go,” he said firmly. “It’s been a pleasure, but the H.A.R.E.S. won’t study for themselves.”

 

The other three groaned. “Come on, mate, a night off will do you good,” James said.

 

Sirius agreed, “And you’ve got to celebrate James’ getting picked, it’s the national team!”

 

Even Peter piped in with “Please, Remus, stay for just one drink.”

 

Remus finally relented. “One drink,” he said firmly.

 

One drink turned into two, turned into three, and by the time that they left the pub via Portkey (friends don’t let friends Apparate drunk), they were swaying a bit and leaning on each other. James started singing “God Save the Queen.”

 

Sirius would later have blurry memories of professing his love to Remus; it was to his great relief that, in the morning, the mirror snarkily informed him that he had been professing, instead, to the floor lamp. “Had a good night?” his reflection asked snidely.

 

Sirius gently shook his head, and then groaned. “No.”

 

“It looked like you were having fun when you declared your love to the lamp,” the mirror continued.

 

Sirius’ head snapped up, and he immediately regretted the motion. “What? The lamp?”

 

“Yes, the lamp,” said his reflection. “You know, it’s been in a relationship with the ceiling fan for six months, and then _you_ come along – now the fan won’t talk to the lamp at all.”

 

“You mean I didn’t tell my friend I loved him?” Sirius asked urgently.

 

“No, instead you ruined a perfectly good relationship. I liked those two together, and –“

 

“But I didn’t tell Remus that I loved him?” Sirius clarified.

 

“No,” the reflection said sullenly. “Is that all that matters to you? Your friend passed out on the couch – always a lightweight, that fellow.”

 

Sirius waved this away and continued putting his hair up, much relieved now, the relationships of household appliances notwithstanding.


	12. H.A.R.E.S. Results

In June, Remus and Lily sat for three days of H.A.R.E.S. at St. Mungo’s. During the days of exams, James, Sirius, and Peter saw very little of their friends; Remus and Lily breakfasted and departed early, returned just in time for dinner, and disappeared into their rooms to cram immediately after. When they were finally over, Remus emerged from his room carrying armloads of empty potion bottles. “Just Pepper-Up Potions for studying,” he assured a concerned Sirius.

 

“I’m not sure that makes it better, Moony,” Sirius told him.

 

The H.A.R.E.S. results were to be delivered a week from the end of the exams, and it was an anxious week for them all. James had a game against Greece, which Remus begged out of. “I just couldn’t concentrate,” he told Sirius. James and his team won handily, thanks in large part to James’ goal-scoring skills, but Sirius had a hard time concentrating too, due mostly to Remus’ absence. Lily, for her part, cheered loudly but confessed to being somewhat distracted by the impending results. Only Peter seemed unaffected.

 

 

Finally, the week of waiting was up. On Saturday, Sirius woke up jittery, and could only imagine how Lily and Remus felt. He joined them in the kitchen, where they sat sipping tea and trying to make small talk. At last they fell into silence, which was broken only by the occasional clink of teacup on saucer.

 

 

“When do you think they’ll send them?” Lily asked anxiously after a few minutes. “We could be waiting all day.”

 

 

“Smethwyck said they send the owls at eight o’clock, I asked,” said Remus. “So we’ll get them a few minutes later… unless one of them is Sirius’ and gets lost.”

 

“Don’t even say that!” Lily squeaked, now biting her nails.

 

Sirius glanced at the kitchen clock. It was half past seven. They waited. Sirius got up and made hot chocolate for himself and Remus. He rearranged the tins of tea in the cupboard.

 

Eight o’clock arrived. He woke James, who stumbled bleary-eyed into the kitchen.

 

At thirty-two minutes past eight, Lily, who had been watching out of the window, suddenly said, “Here they come!”

 

Remus rushed to the window, through which two tawny owls could be seen flying towards them. It seemed to take ages, but they finally landed on the windowsill and held out their legs. Remus and Lily snatched the envelopes from them, and the owls took off. There was a double tearing sound, and then twin deep breaths. Remus looked up first, a relieved look on his face. “Lily?” he asked.

 

She nodded, and then looked up. “I’m a Healer!” she exclaimed. James threw his arms around her.

 

“Moony?” Sirius asked.

 

Remus nodded. “I don’t have to take those bloody exams again!” Sirius hugged him, and then was pushed aside by Lily. Sirius and James, to vent their manly feelings of relief and happiness, high-fived.


	13. Regulus' Graduation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Regulus graduates; Sirius engages in retail therapy

In late June, Sirius returned to Hogwarts to watch his brother graduate. This was something he had never done in his first life, so he didn’t know what to expect. His parents were there, of course – they would never let _Regulus_ graduate without their presence – so Sirius hovered in the background until they went off to find their seats. Then he found Regulus in the milling mass and clapped him on the shoulder. Regulus turned and hugged him. “I can’t believe I’m graduating today!” he exclaimed.

 

“It only gets better from here,” Sirius assured him. “What plans do you have for after graduation?”

 

“I’m working at the Ministry, but Mother and Father want me to stay at Grimmauld Place,” Regulus told him. “I know it’s not what you’d do, but…” he trailed off.

 

Sirius smiled. “If that’s what you want to do, it’s fine. Come by and visit sometime though, yeah? Anyway, you better go find your seat if you want to graduate today.” He gave his brother a little push, and found his own seat, far away from those of his parents.

 

Regulus’ graduation matched up with the memories he had of his own – both times – and he cheered with the rest as Dumbledore announced their promotion to full wizards. Well, he cheered with most of the crowd. Somehow, he just couldn’t imagine Orion and Walburga cheering. Clapping sedately, perhaps. Regulus gave him a wave from the middle of the crowd of recent graduates, which he returned, and then he walked back down to the gates and the Disapparation point, marveling that it had been a year since his own graduation.

 

Feeling old, he decided to do a little shopping. Just hours later…

 

“Guys!” Sirius shouted into the flat. “Guys! Come out here!”

 

With all four of his friends trailing behind, he led them down to the parking garage. There sat a gleaming motorbike.

 

“Guess what I just bought?!” Sirius exclaimed.

 

There was silence. James, who was bouncing on the balls of his feet, looked anxiously at Lily. Peter was admiring the bike. Lily and Remus exchanged Looks.

 

“Please tell me you’re kidding,” Lily said.

 

“Nope!” said Sirius. “Completely and absolutely Sirius!”

 

Without another word, Lily turned on her heel and marched away upstairs. The moment she was out of sight, James actually jumped up and down. “Cool! This is _awesome_ , mate, can I ride it?” They high-fived.

 

“Cool!” Peter echoed, looking impressed.

 

Sirius turned to Remus, eyebrows raised. “Moony?” he prompted. Remus shook his head. “What?” Sirius asked.

 

Remus took a deep breath. “Look, far be it from me to be the voice of reason, but don’t you think it’s a little dangerous? I mean, you’re already practically in the hospital almost every day-“

 

“Pshaw!”

 

“And now you’re adding in a motorbike that can probably go over 120 kph-“

 

“Definitely!”

 

“There’s bound to be an accident anyway, and you’re already the most accident-prone person we know… Doesn’t this seem a little reckless?”

 

“Oh yeah!” Sirius said, beaming, “I forgot the best part – it _flies_!”

 

Remus groaned and covered his face with his hands.

 

 

Despite Remus’ doubts, Sirius fell in love with the motorbike. He and James went out that very night and got into a police chase, which ended only when James discreetly pointed his wand at the police car, upending it in the street. Sirius zoomed around a corner into an alley, from which he punched the red button that allowed him to rise into the air; they landed on a nearby rooftop and waited until the commotion died down. From there, they flew back to the Houghton building, where they parked in the garage and returned, looking as innocent as possible, to the flat.

 

“What did you do?” Lily asked immediately; their innocent expressions had clearly given them away.

 

“Nothing,” James told her. “Just a little night-time ride on Sirius’ new bike.”

 

She looked at them shrewdly, shook her head, and returned to her book.

 

 

The next day after work, Sirius took Peter for a ride around London. Sirius found this rather unpleasant, not least because Peter insisted on squealing like a rat every time he took a sharp turn, which was often.

 

 

It took a week to convince Remus to ride on the bike (Lily flat-out refused), but from Sirius’ perspective it was well worth it. Sirius was careful; it wouldn’t do to end up in St. Mungo’s after Remus’ doubts. He even obeyed traffic laws and took the corners slowly. He couldn’t quite help himself as they were returning to the flat, though; he accelerated down an empty street and relished the feeling of Remus’ arms tightening around him.


	14. Fenrir Greyback

Sirius was trying his hand at making pastry dough on a hot and humid day in July when the Patronus showed up. Bounding through the open window, it sat on the counter and Remus’ voice issued from its mouth. “Sirius. St. Mungo’s, now. Please.” Sirius thought he heard Remus’ voice crack on the last word. The Patronus dissolved and Sirius barreled out to the corridor outside their flat, where he Disapparated.

 

Arriving in the waiting room, he was startled to see a number of reporters, but elbowed his way through them to the Welcome Witch. “I need to see Healer Lupin,” he panted.

 

“First floor,” she chirped. “I’ll make sure he’s there to meet you.”

 

Sirius raced up to the first floor and skidded into the smaller waiting room there. Remus was pacing the floor; otherwise the room was deserted. Sirius hurried over and fell into step with Remus. “What’s wrong?” he asked, trying to get his breath back.

 

Remus stopped. “Fenrir Greyback,” he said bleakly.

 

“Greyback? Wha-? _Here_?” Sirius looked around, furious.

 

“Look, I’m sorry, I didn’t know who else to call… you know about what he did… what he could still do… James and Peter just wouldn’t understand-“

 

“Remus,” Sirius broke in, grabbing his friend’s arms. “Just stop. I don’t mind. Now, tell me what’s going on. Is Greyback here?”

 

Remus took a deep breath and nodded.

 

“Great,” Sirius said, releasing him. “Tell me where. I’m going to kill him.”

 

It was Remus’ turn to seize Sirius’ arm. “No!”

 

“Why not?” Sirius asked reasonably.

 

“Because he’s already dying.”

 

“That’s ok, I’ll just finish him off,” Sirius said, trying in vain to shake Remus off.

 

“I didn’t ask you to come here to kill him,” Remus said quietly, and Sirius went still.

 

“Why did you ask me to come?” Sirius asked.

 

“Because he’s going to die, and I can make it quick and painless – or not. I need you to be my conscience here, Sirius. Help me make this decision. Please.” His voice cracked again.

 

Sirius looked into his friend’s eyes and read the desperation there. “Ok,” he said finally.

 

They proceeded into the ward and stood over Greyback’s bed. Sirius looked at the injured werewolf, who was oblivious to everything around him and muttering to himself, and then at his friend. There was a nasty smell emanating from under the blankets. Remus turned them down to display a festering stomach wound. Sirius felt his own stomach turn and looked away. Remus covered it back up.

 

“He got mauled by another werewolf – one he infected, actually – last week during the full moon, but only came in today,” Remus said. “Fever-Reducing potions are doing nothing. It’s just too late.” He turned to Sirius and there was a pleading note in his voice. “What do I do, Sirius?”

 

Sirius looked at his friend for a long moment, then spared a glance for Greyback. “How long could he last like this?” he asked.

 

“Days, maybe a week,” Remus said.

 

Sirius took a deep breath, despite the smell that lingered in the room, in his nose and mouth.

 

“You do what you always do,” he said at last. “You stop him from suffering, no matter how much he deserves it.”

 

There was an intake of breath from Remus, and he nodded. “You’re right.” Silence. “Will you stay with me?”

 

“Of course.”

 

While Remus fetched the potion, Sirius conjured two chairs by Greyback’s bedside. Remus returned with a small glass vial. He took a deep breath as though steeling himself, then tipped it down Greyback’s throat. Deliberately, he placed the vial on the bedside table, and sank into one of the chairs. Sirius took the other and put his arm around Remus’ shoulder.

 

They sat in silence for a moment. Greyback’s breathing had eased, and he was no longer muttering.

 

“It was an extra-strength dose of the Draught of Living Death,” Remus said eventually. “He won’t feel pain now, and he’ll be gone in a few hours.”

 

“You made the right decision,” Sirius said, squeezing his shoulders in a kind of one-armed hug.

 

Remus nodded. Silence fell again.

 

Sirius lost track of time, but it had to have been almost an hour later when Remus’ head lolled on his shoulder. Sirius tipped his own head to rest on Remus’. He kept watch as the other slept.

 

It was hours later, and Sirius’ arm had long since gone numb when Remus woke.

 

“Sorry I fell asleep on you,” he said in a somewhat muffled voice, as he was rubbing his face with his hands.

 

“I don’t mind,” Sirius said, shaking out his arm and pointing towards the werewolf on the bed. “What about him?”

 

Remus took one look at Greyback and said grimly, “It’s time.”

 

Sirius sat forward and took Remus’ hand. Together, they watched as Greyback’s breathing slowed and finally stopped. Remus squeezed Sirius’ fingers before letting go to take a pulse.

 

“He’s gone,” Remus said, finally.

 

Sirius Vanished the chairs as Remus went to fetch an orderly to deal with the body.

 

“Let’s go home,” Remus said as he returned.

 

Sirius Apparated them back to the flat. Once there, he pulled Remus into a wordless hug. Remus hesitated for what seemed like an eternity to Sirius, then reciprocated. After a moment, he mumbled something into Sirius’ shoulder. Sirius reluctantly pulled away.

 

“What’s that?” he asked.

 

“He was my first patient to die,” Remus repeated.

 

Sirius hugged him again, fiercely. “There wasn’t anything you could have done,” he told him. “All you _could_ do was help him die peacefully.”

 

Remus nodded into his shoulder. After a moment, he pulled away. “I’m going to take a nap before dinner,” he said, and slumped off in the direction of his room. Sirius, in a split-second decision, grabbed a bar of chocolate from the refrigerator and went after him. Turning into Padfoot, he pushed open Remus’ door with his snout – which Remus appeared to have been expecting, as he gave a weak attempt at a smile. “Chocolate won’t fix this one, Pads,” he said, but accepted it and started eating.

 

Sirius jumped up on the bed and curled up near Remus’ feet. Remus reached for him, scratching the back of his head. “Thanks for being there today,” he said. Sirius snuffled. “You’re always there when I need you. But today was bad. Greyback was… well, this is going to sound silly, but remember when we first got here, to this life?” Sirius nodded. “Well, I kind of hoped he wouldn’t be here. It kind of a shock to see him today.” Sirius opened his mouth to respond, but then remembered he was a dog, and shut it again. “And then to be given that power over him – I could have sat and watched him suffer for days… But you made the right call, Sirius. You were absolutely right.” Sirius whined and pushed his snout into Remus’ arm. He took another bite of chocolate and scratched Sirius behind the ears.

 

Sirius was drifting off when Remus’ voice called him back. “Sirius… do you think I should have been the one to attack him?”

 

Sirius sat bolt upright, sending blankets flying, nearly startling Remus off the bed, and shook his head emphatically. “Ok, ok,” Remus said. “You’re right, I could never have done it.” There was a short pause, in which Sirius eyed his friend cautiously. “Still, I’m glad he’s dead,” Remus said defensively, finally. Sirius nodded fervently and lay back down. Remus went back to gently scratching his ears.


	15. Aftermath

Lily’s hand on his shoulder woke him a few hours later. Despite his care in un-entangling himself, Remus woke up as Sirius pulled away, and ambled down the corridor to dinner with a fist in his fur. Lily had clearly heard what had happened with Greyback, and had equally clearly told James and Peter, so dinner was a quiet affair.

 

 

In fact, the days following the Greyback incident were quiet in general. There was an article about his death in the _Daily Prophet_ the following day; Morwenna Fortescue, the journalist, came by the flat to ask Remus if he would be willing to be listed as a victim of Greyback, but Remus refused. (“I don’t want to be seen as a victim, for one thing,” he later told Sirius, “and for another, I don’t need anti-werewolf protestors at St. Mungo’s while I’m trying to work.”)

 

 

Despite the lack of what Morwenna called “a personal touch,” the article was thoughtful and mostly avoided tarring all werewolves with the same brush.

_The werewolf Fenrir Greyback, 42, is dead,_ reported the _Daily Prophet_. _Mauled by one of his own victims, who placed himself near Greyback on the night of the full moon, Greyback was taken to St. Mungo’s Hospital last Tuesday morning by members of the Magical Law Enforcement Department. Greyback was involved in a pending trial, having allegedly intentionally infected up to 16 other members of the magical community. The_ Daily Prophet _regrets that he will not face judgment from a jury of his peers, but members of the community will undoubtedly rest easier knowing that this particularly vicious specimen of the unfortunate infected will no longer be a threat. The_ Daily Prophet’s _thoughts remain with those who continue to be afflicted with lycanthropy. Greyback was far from a typical example of the infected, and it is to be hoped that those who suffer from this disease must not also suffer for the crimes of another._

 

 

When Sirius handed Remus the article, he tsked and set it aside without reading it, but Sirius saw him perusing it later.

 

 

“At least it doesn’t mention the victims by name,” he said at dinner that night when they were all discussing the _Prophet’_ s approach to the obituary.

 

 

Lily nodded. “It’s a shame that you can’t come forward, though,” she said.

 

 

“I wonder if I could have, though,” Remus confided to Sirius later. “In this world, there seems to be a lot more acceptance of lycanthropy as a disease instead of a personal shortcoming. What do you think?”

 

Sirius clapped him on the shoulder. “I think it’s totally up to you whether and when to tell the public that you were bitten,” he reassured Remus. “And maybe being mentioned in the same article as Greyback wouldn’t be such a great way to do it, regardless of the world we’re in.”

 

Remus nodded. “You’re probably right. Greyback was horrible, and I want nothing more to do with him.”

 

Despite such declarations, it took days after the Greyback incident for Remus to smile again, and in the meantime, Sirius realized how much he’d come to rely on that smile, and exactly what he’d do to see it again.

 

Operation Getting-Moony-to-Smile-Again did not find much of a footing with Peter or James, who told Sirius that “Moony will be fine, mate; just give him time,” but Sirius had never been accused of being patient. He seemed to spend a lot of time as Padfoot, fetching chocolate bars, and making tea, but he was finally rewarded a few days later when he tried to reach the kettle as Padfoot and succeeded only in swiping everything off of the counter. Remus laughed aloud, and came to help him as he transformed, cursing, back into Sirius.

 

Sirius was relieved when this appeared to be a turning point, that he did not have to rely on such slapstick to amuse his friend; it was rather hard on his back, for one thing, and Lily scolded him on a daily basis for leaving messes in his wake.

 


	16. The World Cup

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius discovers something more important than Quidditch.

It was finally August, and that meant time for the World Cup of Quidditch. Belgium had narrowly defeated Ireland, which meant that it was going to be Belgium versus Britain. As friends of one of Britain’s Chasers, Remus, Lily, Sirius, and Peter were given seats in one of the Top Boxes with the friends and family of the other players. Mr. and Mrs. Potter were also there; it was the first time they had been able to come to a game since James had been chosen for the British team, and Sirius was thrilled to see his surrogate parents. Finally, the crowd quieted as the referee was announced and the players lined up at one of the hallways halfway up from the ground. Then the players were announced: The British Chasers: Thomas Donahue…Ewan Carmichael…James Potter! The British Beaters: Chris Angus and John Haywood! And the British Seeker: Michael Grant! The Belgian team was similarly announced, and the players zipped around the stadium, showing off. James gave a jaunty wave to his family and friends. Lily threw him a kiss, which he mimed catching. Eventually, the players were called down to the field and the referee released the balls. The British Chasers, including James, took possession of the Quaffle immediately, and James scored seconds later. Half the stadium roared with delight; Sirius punched the air. Mr. and Mrs. Potter hugged each other. But James wasn’t done. After a heart-stopping moment in which the Belgian Chasers took possession of the Quaffle, he swooped past one of them and reversed direction so quickly it took a moment for the other Chasers on his team to realize that he had taken the Quaffle. He scored again. Sirius raised his Omnioculars to his eyes; there was a spell on the Quaffle that made it glow through the Omnioculars, leaving an orange trail through the air. This was somewhat annoying when the action was slow-paced enough to track the movement of the Quaffle with the naked eye, but he had to admit it was helpful when the action was this quick. Carmichael and Donahue each scored once, bringing the score to 40-0, and James brought the points up to fifty. The Top Box they were in cheered wildly. But the Belgian Beaters were getting restless, and began hitting the Bludgers closer and harder. One nearly unseated James; he had to flip his broom to avoid it, and the Beaters got what they wanted; he had lost control of the Quaffle. From that turnover, the Belgians scored once. The action got faster yet; Sirius had to keep one eye on the scoreboard to keep track. The Belgians scored twice more, but they were no match for the British Chasers. 

Four hours in, the Chasers began to tire, and from the looks of it, so did the Belgian Beaters, who had spent the vast majority of their time chasing down and hitting the iron balls. The British Beaters, on the other hand, who had spent the first four hours of the match on defense, seemed to just be warming up. The score was now 160-30, and even Sirius was getting tired. “I hope they catch the Snitch soon,” Remus said hoarsely as they applauded the latest goal by James. Sirius nodded, not trusting his voice. Finally, James scored three goals in a row, bringing the score to 190-30, and the game looked nearly won; even if the Snitch were caught by the Belgian Seeker at this point, the British team would win. But the Snitch remained elusive and Belgium, perhaps sensing weakness, scored again. Although Sirius was ready for the game to be over, he was not prepared to see a draw, so he cheered the British Chasers on (they scored twice more) and was elated when Grant, the British Seeker, went into a dive at one end of the stadium. Elieu, the Belgian Seeker, tried to catch up, but Grant had the head start, and pulled out of the dive holding aloft the Golden Snitch. 

“Yes!” Sirius shouted, along with half of the stadium. Turning, he pulled Remus, who was next to him, into a hug, and crashed his lips down onto Remus’. For half a second, which seemed like an eternity to Sirius, Remus didn’t respond. Just as Sirius was about to pull away, Remus began to kiss him back, and it was paradise. He ran his hands through Remus’ hair, and kissed him like there was no such thing as air. And when they broke apart, gasping, for once, the most important thing in the world was not Quidditch.


	17. The Declaration

After the British won, there was a party, the like of which Sirius had never seen. The entire Quidditch team had invited friends and family, though the parents begged off only a few minutes in. Sirius couldn’t blame them; the atmosphere was joyous, but the British team were hard partiers. Even James seemed taken aback by a new drinking game borrowed from Muggle universities called the “keg stand,” and he had been partying with them since June. Lily shook her head and checked her bag for Sobering Potions. It was nearly midnight when the party began, and it was almost two before Sirius saw Remus sneaking away and followed him. 

“Can you Apparate?” he asked, catching up to Remus outside of the pub where the party was being held. 

Remus jumped and whipped out his wand, pointing it at him before he recognized him in the streetlight. “Merlin, Sirius, you took me by surprise.”

“Sorry.”

“It’s ok,” he said, putting away his wand. “Yeah, I’ll Apparate us home.”

One successful trip through the crushing nothingness later, they arrived in the middle of the living room. Sirius let go of Remus’ arm, reluctantly, then took a deep breath, steeling himself for what he was about to say.

“I’m sorry about kissing you earlier,” he said finally.

Remus looked at him, searching. “I’m not,” he said. 

“What?” Sirius asked.

“I’m not sorry you kissed me,” Remus repeated. “But it’s ok that you are.” He turned to go, but Sirius caught his sleeve. 

“Hang on, Moony. You’re – you’re not sorry?”

“No,” Remus said simply, and waited, because Sirius still hadn’t let go of his sleeve. 

“But – but what about the other guy? The one from work?”

Remus gave him a strange look. “There was never any guy from work. What are you talking about?”

Sirius shook his head. “No, I overheard you talking to Lily about someone who would never love you back.”

“Oh, Sirius,” Remus sighed. “That was you, you idiot.”

Sirius didn’t say anything for a moment, stunned. 

“Sirius?”

No response. Remus sighed. “I knew you’d take it like this. I told Lily-“

“No,” Sirius broke in. “Wait, you think I could never love you back?”

Remus gave him a look that said, obviously. 

“You mean all this time, I’ve been upset because you were in love with someone else and there never was anyone else?”

“Why would you be upset?” Remus wanted to know.

“You moron, Moony, I love you.”

There was silence for a moment. Sirius was just as stunned by what he had just said as Remus seemed to be. 

“You what?” Remus whispered. 

“I love you,” Sirius repeated wonderingly. “Really, I do.”

Remus didn’t move, but Sirius pulled him close and kissed him, and he didn’t seem to mind that. And neither did Sirius, so they kept doing it, until Lily and James got home, and James, who was still a little drunk, started applauding, and Lily started laughing, and crying a bit, and saying Finally, you two finally figured it out, and then Sirius pulled away but kept an arm around Remus and pulled him towards his bedroom, where they kept trading kisses, feather-light, until they fell asleep.


	18. Regulus Comes to Dinner

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lots of fluff. Fluffy fluffy fluff.

In late August, Regulus came to dinner. Sirius was delighted, romping around in a Padfoot-like manner to make sure everything was ready. Remus seemed nervous, but he dressed in his best robes and helped to make dinner (which was a good thing, because the only thing Sirius had truly mastered was the pudding course). 

Regulus rang the doorbell at half past six, just on time. Sirius opened the door, and his brother gave him a huge smile and a hug. “Sirius!” he enthused. “You have no idea how happy I am to see you after this past week. The Ministry is an absolute swamp of bureaucracy, and I have to be on my best behavior all the time. No one has any sense of humor about anything! You’re so lucky that you left home before Mother and Father got you a job there.”

Sirius agreed, ushering him in. “That’s too bad, Reg. What exactly is your job there?”

“I’m undersecretary to the Assistant Undersecretary to the Head of Magical Law Enforcement,” Regulus told him. 

“Interesting,” Sirius said, then called for Remus to come out of the kitchen. 

“Not really,” Regulus replied cheerfully. “It’s awfully dull, actually. Hi Remus!” He hugged him, which visibly startled Remus, who had put out a hand to shake. 

“Hi Regulus,” he said, clearly trying to regain some composure. 

“So you obviously remember Remus, my boyfriend,” Sirius said as Regulus pulled away.

“Oh, you two are finally together then!” Regulus said brightly. “I always hoped you’d figure that out.”

Sirius rolled his eyes. “You and Lily, honestly. You think you’re so smart just because you figured it out before we did.”

“Everyone figured it out before you did, Sirius,” Regulus told him in an annoyingly patronizing tone. “Even Mother, and she wasn’t even at school with you.”

Remus looked alarmed. “Your mother?” he repeated.

“Don’t worry, she doesn’t approve,” Regulus assured him. “If she did, Sirius would never have fallen for you in the first place. So dinner smells delicious, who cooked?”

“Remus,” Sirius said. “But I did pudding.”

Dinner was a success, if Sirius did say so himself, and he did. Remus had whipped up an amazing linguine, and pudding was eclairs that he’d made from scratch. Regulus chattered on and on about his job at the Ministry, and the gossip that he heard. He seemed fascinated by Sirius’ job at Gringotts, and, with a little prompting, Sirius re-enacted one of his most recent escapades, which involved a dramatic escape from a vault using nothing but his own hand, which he had Transfigured to resemble that of a goblin. 

“We had to regrow all the bones in his hand later that night, of course,” put in Remus, who was looking a bit more at his ease now that it was clear that Regulus approved of the relationship. 

“It was worth it,” Sirius protested. 

Wide-eyed, Regulus demanded more stories, and it was late into the night before he glanced at the clock and yelped. “Mother will kill me if I don’t get home now. I told her I was going out with some friends from work, but she insists on keeping the same curfew from school holidays.” He hugged Sirius and Remus one more time, and Disapparated. 

Sirius looked at Remus. “I think that was a success,” he said. 

Remus nodded and waved his wand at the dishes, which started washing themselves. “I’m glad he was ok with us,” he said, and Sirius grinned and put his arms around his boyfriend. 

“It wouldn’t have mattered, you know,” he said. “You’re worth anything, even the disapproval of my brother.”

Remus turned in his arms so he was facing Sirius, and kissed him, long and slow. “You know I don’t have a brother, but you’re worth it to me, too.”


	19. Snape

On a warm day in September, a week before the full moon, Sirius drove his motorbike to St. Mungo’s to pick Remus up from work. This was doubly convenient because he couldn’t Apparate; the dragon at work had stepped on his wand and broken it the day before, and he had yet to replace it.

Remus looked up from his clipboard when Sirius walked into the ward. “I’m almost done here, but then I have to go pick up a potion from the potions master. You can come with me, if you want.”

Sirius nodded and waited while Remus finished writing, then handed the clipboard to the Healer coming on duty. Remus led the way down to the basement, which somewhat resembled the dungeons at Hogwarts. (“Why are potions always made in dungeons?” “For the ambience. Shut up.”) He stopped outside a heavy door with braces made of wrought iron. 

“You have to promise to be on your best behaviour,” he said seriously. “And I really mean it.”

Sirius spread his hands innocently. “Promise.”

Remus nodded once and then knocked and opened the door. The room was full of cauldrons steaming and giving off odd smells. The one nearest the door looked full of blood. Sirius shuddered. Then a figure came through the mist; a stringy, pallid-looking individual, whose greasy hair competed for attention with his hooked nose. 

“Snivellus,” Sirius said softly, and Remus stepped on his foot. 

“Snape,” Remus said civilly.

“Lupin,” replied Snape. “And you brought Black, I see.” Sirius hardly missed the way Snape’s hand went to his inside pocket, where, no doubt, his wand was hidden.

“We’re just here to pick up my potion, and then we’ll be out of your hair,” Remus promised. 

Sirius coughed to disguise his “Ew.” Snape’s head swiveled towards him. “Something in your throat, Black?” he asked.

Sirius shook his head. Snape gave him an appraising look and then turned away to ladle something out of one of the cauldrons. Remus glared at him. “You promised,” he said under his breath. 

Sirius gave him his most innocent smile. Remus rolled his eyes. Unfortunately, this was just as Snape turned back with the smoking vial, and he apparently took it as an insult, and whipped his wand out. 

“What was that, Lupin?” he spat. 

“Whoa now,” Sirius said, stepping between them. “No offense meant, Sni- Snape.”

“I’m sure,” snarled Snape. “But I saw that, Lupin. Now, if I weren’t a professional, I’d accidentally add bat spleen to this.”

Sirius bared his teeth and drew himself up to his full height. “Are you threatening him, Snivellus?”

“Sirius,” Remus said sternly, but the situation was too far out of hand. At the mention of his school nickname, Snape had thrown the vial to one side, where it skittered into the flames beneath another cauldron, cracked, and blew up. At the same time, he had wordlessly sent a violet flash of light directly at Sirius, who caught it in his arm. While Sirius staggered, his arm numb and feeling abnormally heavy, Remus backed away. 

“Sectumsempra!” roared Snape, pointing his wand at Remus now, but Sirius dove in front of the nearly invisible curse and caught the worst of it along his back and shoulder. Remus dropped to his knees next to Sirius and cast a Protego between them and Snape. The white light held Snape back, but it was too late for Sirius; pain exploded along his left side, and he felt himself losing the battle with consciousness.

When he woke, it was to find Remus holding his hand and looking exhausted. 

“Thank Merlin,” he said when he saw Sirius open his eyes. “For a while I thought you’d lost too much blood.” Sirius tried to look around without moving his neck, which felt stiff and painful. “You’re on the fourth floor of St. Mungo’s,” Remus added. “Do you remember what happened?”

“Snape cursed me, I remember that,” Sirius said.

“He tried to curse me,” Remus corrected him. “And you jumped in front of it. Thank you for that.” He looked near to tears. “You moron.”

Sirius tried to smile, but probably only succeeded in grimacing. “Better me than you. You’re the Healer, after all.”

“You moron,” Remus repeated, and then he really did start to cry. Sirius squeezed his hand.

“Don’t cry, Moony. Please. I’m ok, thanks to you.”

Remus shook his head. “I barely did anything. I couldn’t even stop the bleeding – it was a really nasty curse. The Potions Master, Belby, he rushed in just as you lost consciousness, and he magicked you onto a stretcher and got you upstairs where they could heal you. It took nearly an hour before they stopped the bleeding, and even then they couldn’t tell me if you would wake up.”

“What about Snape?” Sirius asked. “Does Belby know what happened?”

“I told Belby everything,” Remus reassured him. “And Snape’s in serious trouble. Suspended, I think, and he’s going to be up in front of the Wizengamot.”

“Will you still be able to get your potion?” Sirius wanted to know next. 

Remus nodded. “Belby can make it too – the only other wizard who can, he invented it, actually. And Snape made this month’s batch before getting suspended, so I don’t even have to wait.”

Sirius made a face. “Are you sure you trust him? After what he said about the bat spleen… I don’t know, Moony.”

Remus shook his head. “He wouldn’t risk his job to poison me.”

“He tried to curse you!”

“That’s different,” Remus said firmly. “Besides, Belby can easily test it to make sure it’s right.”

They sat in silence for a moment, then Remus said quietly, “Thank you, Sirius.”

Sirius nodded. “You don’t have to keep thanking me, Remus. It was kind of my fault that he tried to curse you to begin with.”

Remus let out a snuffling laugh. “Yeah, maybe don’t antagonize known Death Eaters in the future.”

“And he’s not even a Death Eater in this reality!”

“Doesn’t mean he’s not still dangerous, Padfoot,” Remus said somberly. “You know they think he made up that curse himself?”

“Really?”

“Yeah. So let’s stay away from him, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Sirius agreed fervently. “Merlin.”

It was late into the evening when the Healer kicked Remus out, but he promised to be back first thing in the morning. Sirius fell into a restless sleep, missing Remus curled against him, as that was how they spent most of their nights now. 

At nine o’clock sharp, Remus was allowed back into the ward, and he brought good news; Sirius would be allowed out of the hospital.

“And the first thing we’re doing is getting you a new wand, so you don’t have to go jumping in front of curses,” he said firmly. Sirius, his skin still knitting back together, could only agree.

They stopped at Ollivander’s, and Sirius waved wands in the air until one sent golden sparks flying from its tip and surrounded Remus’ head. He laughed as he batted at them, and they set off back to the apartment arm-in-arm.


	20. Epilogue

Winter came; Christmas produced a panicked Sirius, wondering what to buy for his boyfriend (James saved the day when he suggested a Protean Charmed parchment that allowed them to communicate wherever and whenever they wished). Spring arrived, bringing with it “Motorcycle weather!” as Sirius announced, beaming, to his friends one day.

 

Regulus regularly came to dinner, and told Sirius solemnly one night over drinks, “You should marry that boy.”

 

Sirius started thinking about it, and when he talked to James about it, his friend brightened. “We could do a double proposal!” he suggested.

 

It turned out that James had a lot of ideas, having thought about this since third year, and a lot of those ideas were crazily elaborate.

 

“Mate,” Sirius said finally. “Stop. Let’s just take this down a notch. What about a nice dinner at the Three Broomsticks, and then we can do the whole down-on-one-knee thing?”

 

James made a face. “Wouldn’t it be cooler if we wrote it in the clouds?” he asked.

 

“It would certainly be mental-er,” Sirius agreed. “And also, someone would be bound to notice. There’s only so far we can bend the laws for those we love.”

 

In the end, James agreed, and it was with great trepidation and excitement that Sirius saw the date of the dinner approach.

 

Finally, the night of the intended proposal arrived, but Sirius had a tiny problem. Namely, he was naked and locked out of his flat, where his clothes, wand, hair, and ring for Remus were waiting. (It was a long story, but the short version involved a shaving accident due to a new, very thorough, hair-removal spell that removed him but left the hair exactly where it had been.)

 

Hammering on the door did more harm than good, as Lily, James, and Remus had already left for the restaurant and Peter was working late, and the noise brought his neighbours to the corridor. Sirius just managed to hide behind a potted plant, but it was a narrow escape.

 

But it was not for nothing that Sirius was a Marauder. Armed with only his wits and a Diner’s Club credit card pickpocketed from a neighbor who passed too close to his potted plant, he had the door open at last. The next problem was reattaching his hair (most of it, anyway), which took the better part of an hour but was totally worth it because Sirius refused to propose while bald, followed by a mad rush through traffic to the restaurant. After all that, there was no parking near the restaurant, so Sirius took the practical approach.

 

Remus later told Sirius that things had been almost unbearably awkward inside the restaurant before his arrival. For one thing, Remus had been a third wheel to a very romantic dinner between James and Lily. For another, James had started out nervous, but gotten more so as the meal went on. According to Remus, by pudding James was looking at the door, expecting Sirius, so often that he appeared to have a twitch. Finally, pudding arrived and James decided that the best course of action was to continue with the plan despite Sirius’ absence. He was just getting down to one knee when there was a roar and the doors to their private dining room opened with a bang to reveal Sirius, on his flying motorbike.

 

Still hovering near the table, fading in and out of view due to a hastily applied Disillusionment Charm, Sirius began the rehearsed proposal, a bewildered James joining in as he went along.

 

“Remus John Lupin…”

“Lily Marie Evans…” sputtered James hastily.

 

They recited together: “Would you do me the honor of becoming my …”

 

“Wife?” asked James, pulling out a ring with an air of practiced ease.

 

“Husband?” asked Sirius, pulling out a ring with such enthusiasm that it flew through the air and landed in Lily’s wineglass.

 

Lily started laughing so hard that she couldn’t get the breath to respond to an increasingly anxious James, who seemed to be under the impression that she was laughing at him. Remus, however, struggled to keep a straight face as he replied to Sirius, who was frantically searching for the ring, “Of course I’ll marry you, you dozy idiot.”

 

There was a double wedding the next fall. The leaves were golden and red (“Gryffindor colors!” exclaimed James), and not a dry eye remained in the place when bride and groom, and groom and groom kissed and then hugged in a fivesome (Peter, the ring-bearer, joined in).

All was well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!


End file.
